So, last week I left the comfy, drought-ridden, hazy and slightly scorched confines of my Los Angeles home for the moist, green landscape and bright clean air of Seattle and other random bits of Washington State. Now, you probably think I heart Seattle. Or looove it. Or lurve it. Lurve – is that a thing? Do the kids say “lurve”? Are the kids that dumb? I mean, I know they’re dumb cause they’re The Kids and the whole purpose of the next generation is for them to be dumber than we were so we don’t feel so bad about ourselves for getting old and not understanding their music or clothes or YouTube videos or the Instagram GET OFF MY LAWN!...
New Dating App ̶...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
San Antonio, TX – Monday By Joshua Mauldin In an effort to streamline the courting process for men who confuse self-hatred with selfless devotion, a San Antonio-based startup launched the dating application Savior this morning. “With Savior, men searching for relationships that...
Star Trek Into Darkn...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
From Box Office Mojo. Star Trek Into Darkness *beamed to the top of the box office this weekend with a domestic take of $84M. Not a bad showing, though expectations were tracking a little closer to $100M. The knee jerk reaction here is to blame the lack of a strong villain in the marketing...
New WU-TANG CLAN Sin...
posted by Tom Stillwagon
New Wu-Tang??? Wanna hear it? Here it go: The track Execution in Autumn, including verses from Inspectah Deck, RZA, U-God and Raekwon comes from the new album A Better Tomorrow, expected to drop before the end of the year. But that’s not all, the reunion continues. Wu-Tang Clan will...
Five Rejected New Reality Shows For The Fall Seaso...
posted by Amanda Rowse
1. The Pole Package Live audience vote-in competition to find the best exotic dancer in the country. Ex-Playboy playmate and reality television superstar Kendra Wilkinson, famed dancer turned actor Mikhail Baryshnikov and zany comedic personality Rosie O’Donnell bring multiple viewpoints and a range of show business experience to the judges’ table. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll spend $10 for a Diet Coke! Image Credit: Pole Fitness Congleton Cheshire 2. A Pole Lotta Love A concurrently airing spin-off of The Pole Package following a former/current contestant’s search for true love. Each...
The Classic Video Ga...
posted by Jersey Joe
You take an arcade game, add a hamburger-making chef in a kitchen gone wild, and you’ve got yourself hours of guaranteed fun! BurgerTime, the 80s arcade classic still entertains in the 21st century and has players lining up for seconds! BurgerTime, created by Data East, was released in 1982...
Woman Given Honorary...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Pittsburgh, PA – Friday By Joshua Mauldin The sociology department at Carnegie Mellon University announced this morning that they have awarded 64-year-old Pittsburgh resident Margaret Sanders an honorary Ph.D. in Negative Marital Observance. “We’re convinced that no human...
Video Review –...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Lexington P. Monoclesworth leads the crew of the Starship Enterprise into darkness…for a while. Another solid summer blockbuster, what gives? Either I’m going soft (ahem) or this year is starting off rather pleasantly. Spoiler Alert 2/3rds in but marked appropriately. Be a...
“Mr. T Ate My ...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
I’m always saying we should be way embarrassed about what we’re putting out in space for other civilizations to find, and I think this xkcd comic totally backs me. Be a...
Mo’ Problems Getting Mo’ Money [Horror...
posted by Madame HR
Any tips on how I can get a raise? The 2% they’ve been giving me every year is not enough. I was looking on salary.com and it says I should be making thousands more than I am. How do I get them to pay me what I’m worth? –I Deserve More Dear More, You’ve been getting 2% every year? Wow, lucky you! Since the economy exploded a few years ago, I think it would be difficult to find many people out there who have been getting steady increases every year. I think most who are employed are grateful to have a job and most who aren’t employed just really hate you right now. Here’s a universal truth for you: EVERY employee thinks they are...
Tony Stark Covers JT...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
Can you tell I’m super-excited about having seen three whole summer movies already? Here’s yet another spoiler-rific parody– this time Tony Stark covers Justin Timberlake with “Suits that Fly.” However awesome you think this is going to be, I’m telling you...
Technolog-a.d.d. [What the Tech?!]
posted by Michele Agius
I read about two hours of tech news a day, all from various sources. Some are geared to alert consumers about new products coming to market, some are more business oriented (startups, acquisitions, etc.), and some of the stuff I read veers into the dark trenches of R&D. So deep your mind probably can’t handle it. Technology, science and discovery are moving at such a rapid pace that fifty years from now, 90% of what we know won’t resemble anything we know today. I’ll let that marinate with you for a second. This week I’ve decided to bring you a ton of random information about this past week in technology and...
Veterinarian Says Ca...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Chicago, IL – Thursday By Joshua Mauldin After a ten year study of feline behavior, Veterinarian Genesis Allen, concluded this morning that cats who won’t defecate in their litter boxes are punishing their owners for reasons only they understand. “You may have cuddled with...
Pac Man Seat [One Mo...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
So wish this seat was a real thing you could by as opposed to just a design concept. Find out more at designer Bruno Marques’ website. [h/t LikeCool] Be a...
A Moderate Network S...
posted by Janelle Burmaster
This post is going to be weak and I’ll tell you why. Network television during the summer is weak. A lot of your favorites are probably returning, but if you’re like me, they cost extra. Cable has by far the better options, but the networks are still trying. This summer, each...
Duplicate Dudes Do B...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
File this clever duplication Beyonce medley video under “Fills me with glee.” [h/t Jezebel] Be a...
Rochester Big &...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
New York, NY – Wednesday By Joshua Mauldin Amidst protests from anti-normal-shaming groups, Rochester Big & Tall CEO Marco Jorello remains steadfast in both his company’s image and business model. During an interview with The Portly Register, Jorello admitted that his company...
Rick James & Ne...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Not exactly, but before James was caught AWOL by the Navy, they were briefly in a band together called The Mynah Birds. The ironically titled single It’s My Time is one of the great lost Motown treasures from the 60′s. Be a...
Avenger Kitties Asse...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
Jenny Parks, the illustrator behind Dr. Meow is back with Kitty Avengers. In other news, Jenny Parks is freaking awesome! [via i09] Be a...
Urethral Orgasm? [Ask Dr. Miro: What You Didn’t Le...
posted by Miro Gudelsky
Dear Dr. Miro, How come when I’m having sex it sometimes feels like I have to pee and it’s not from G-Spot stimulation? I’m looking at biology books and can’t figure out how the urethra is connected to sexual arousal but it must be because it’s right there and sometimes when I hold it in for a long time I can actually have an orgasm! Please explain. Sincerely, Full Bladder Bertie Dear FBB, The urethra and the bladder are squished in there with all of your sexual organs. When you get turned on, there is a lot of swelling. In males it is obvious because you see the penis become tumescent, or erect. In females it is not as obvious but they...
Katy Perry’s &...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
This video of Katie Perry prior to the lady-smooching, cherry Chapstick fiasco has been around a while but I just discovered it so shut up. Circa 2002, Perry’s performing what I assume is a song entitled Search Me on the self-proclaimed Christian Trinity Broadcasting Network. As someone...
Alternative OBLIVION...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
As a mother of three, the thought of having this many hands on deck for child-raising fills my heart with glee. Although, I think in this non-mom-written case, the mom character might be saying “this is awesome” at the end of this HISHE alternative ending for another reason. [via...
WTF Podcast With Noa...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Writer/Director Noah Baumbach sat down with Marc Maron to discuss his new film Frances Ha, as well as forgotten gem Kicking and Screaming and minor masterpiece The Squid and the Whale. For fans of Baumbach’s “adults dealing with prolonged adolescence” like myself, it’s...
Google Image Searche...
posted by Joshua Mauldin
Mountain View, CA – Tuesday By Joshua Mauldin Google announced this morning that image searches for stills from the 1998 made-for-television movie Gia have increased exponentially over the last twelve hours. The film, based on the life of troubled model Gia Carangi, was relatively...
Disney Prom [One Mor...
posted by Ernessa T. Carter
Deviantartist spicystewdemon, reimagines Disney characters as prom picture-takers and it is AWESOME. Click through to The Mary Sue to see even more Disney Prom Pictures, including ones for the Rescuers and the Hunchback and Esmerelda. [h/t The Mary Sue] Be a...