Nip/Tuck is begins a new season tomorrow at 10pm on FX. Thank the Lord, I’m sick of not wasting time. I need something like this to distract me from my life goals, which I’ve been steadily working towards while TV was on its stupid winter hiatus. I hope they bring Sharon Gless’ crazy-ass Build-A-Bear stalker back. She was fun. Not for the plastic surgeon she shot up bad in his own OR, no. But for everyone else, definitely.

And Damages, which is slightly less old and hoary is coming back on Wednesday. Obviously FX loves us. It really, really loves us. New Year’s Reso-what???

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A blogumn by Kelli Bielema

Tofurky and almost all the trimmings

I was raised on meat, potatoes and more meat. This is what you feed on for 3 squares daily in the Midwest.  Living in Los Angeles I didn’t stop the carnivorous mayhem: hot dogs wrapped in bacon at the non-regulated food carts in the Fashion District, carne asada marinated over two days from the carnicero in Eagle Rock, Zankou Chicken with extra garlic sauce.  While I have claimed my charcoal-grilled baby back ribs were the best in the land, I made them for the last time in Seattle nearly 2 years ago.  That’s right, I am now a……vegetarian!

It all started a year ago January, not as any sort of resolution but prompted by reading Skinny Bitch, perusing the internet and talking to friends.  I initially became vegan.  I simply wanted to see if I could do it for 30 days and quite honestly, it was relatively simple. Vegans do not eat or consume any animal products. Naturally the list includes meat, dairy, eggs, seafood, and goes as far as honey in most vegan schools of thought. Now granted, I live in one of the crunchiest cities on earth, so access to organic, plant-based food in Seattle is a lot simpler than say, Prophetstown, Illinois, where I grew up.

When I shared with my family that I was now eating this way, well, you can only imagine the confusion.  My dad thinks that this means I still eat fish—I’ve never really eaten fish.  So, I usually explain to the fam, as well as others who are boggled by the mere thought of not gnawing on flesh of another being at a meal.  “Where will you get your protein?…your calcium? …your _____ — fill in random necessary nutritional element.”  This is the most common question, to which I can only say there are websites that contain outstanding information if you are curious about what the heck it’s all about as well as recipes to satisfy that pesky no-meat-eatin’-dinner guest. And if you’re ready to make that move into veganism, you can get a free vegan starter pack from Action for Animals, which includes multiple pamphlets, coupons and STICKERS!!!!

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Wow, and I thought I was a Thundercat fan. This may very well be the best fan video in the history of Ever. Just sayin…

So if you’ve made it two weeks into your three for your tri-weekly habit, very good news: The hard bit is over and the last week should feel like a breeze. You’ll be wondering what took you so long to acquire this habit and you’ll be imagining your future life, even better now that you’ve required this habit that you’re going to keep forever. Either that, are you’ll be dying to finish with it already.

I happen to be in the first boat with my 20 minutes of exercise and writing a day. I haven’t particularly liked the exercise bit. I don’t necessarily feel better physically — I am after all pregnant. But emotionally it’s really nice to know that I probably won’t die of a heart attack while trying to push out this kid. Also, prenatal yoga is super-gentle and relaxing and it’s helping me stretch all sorts of muscles I’ll supposedly want to be loose and limber which it comes time to push, so yea, for less pain. I’ll definitely hang on to the exercise for now.

But the habit I really want to keep is the writing everyday. My 2009 goal is to get another novel fully written — this time in one year as opposed to three, so writing every day will be a huge part of that.

A good way to seal in your habit after the initial 21 days is to run the habit again — but for double the time. For example, next week, I’ll start a new Tri-Weekly habit of writing for 40 minutes everyday as opposed to 20. As for my lifestyle-habit, for once in my life I don’t have a big project scheduled in the coming weeks, so I’m thinking about trying not to spend money on anything, save necessities. However, I’m not sure my pregnancy hormones will allow me to embark on such a monkish project, so we’ll see how I’m feeling about the venture next week.

So if you wanted to try 21 days of habit with me but missed the last cycle, start thinking about a habit you want to keep now. One should be career or goal-oriented habit (like writing or applying for jobs or exercising to lose a certain amount of weight) the other should be a meta or lifestyle habit (like meditating or flossing or exercising without a specific weight loss goal). Start brainstorming about it now, and we’ll meet up next week to talk about the next cycle. Til then…

Thrive in ‘09,

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In the basement of a house on Memory Lane in Kalamazoo, Michigan somewhere between 1987 and 1989 I wrote a nonsense poem called “Blogger Old Potatoes.” In my hands, “blogger” was the improvised swear word of a two-year old girl.

But according to Wikipedia, the word “blogger” was first coined round about April or May 1999, over a decade after my poem.

“Blogger Old Potatoes” appeared in the second issue of Los Angeles 1956 The Magazine, published during the winter of 1989-1990 and copyright 1990 by The Pained Thumb Press; edited by Harold Abramowitz, who also illustrated the poem.

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Okay, I kind of got creamed last week. And Anne from Arizona and LarDogM from The Internet kind of put the nail in my coffin by guessing that last Wednesday’s GTRL was “Don’t Fear the Reaper” by The Blue Oyster Cult.

Annoying, but it’s totally a new year, and I doubt you guys will be able to get the better of me this week.

That gauntlet all thrown down, who sang these wonderfully cynical lyrics?

There’s really nothing, nothing we can do
Love must be forgotten, life can always start up anew.

Answers in the comments, and special treat after the jump. Not only do we have the original Blue Oyster Cult version of “Don’t Fear the Reaper,”  (check the sweet tasche and mullet set) but we also have that super-sexed up Alice Band cover which Anne introduced me to last week. Thanks, Anne!

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So CH and I have been talking on and off about a acquiring a Basset Hound for the etCH menagerie since the summer. But after attending a New Years Party with a really friendly new kitty named Riley Ryan in attendance, I got a little obsessed.

It all started innocently enough. “Where did you get Riley Ryan?” I asked our husband host.

And without going into the lovely and dramatic story he told us, the answer boiled down to Craigslist.

Oh Craigslist. Suddenly I was flooded with my own fondness for the list. Though we haven’t talked much in the last year, we have quite a history. After I moved to Los Angeles, I found my first car, apartment, freelance journalism gigs and dates on Craigslist. Yes, all on Craigslist! Craigslist also led me to The Derby Dolls and countless other adventures. I adore Craigslist.

But you know what I’ve never found on Craigslist? A pet! So with some excitement, I started stalking the list for a basset hound.

And so far, no luck. We’ve found exactly three candidates: one was already adopted by the time we call the rescue shelter; the second was too old — we don’t want a puppy, but we also don’t want to have the death talk with our kids when they’re like 3; and the third rescue wasn’t quite what was advertised, in that it looked nothing like it’s picture — which was kind of funny, because I hadn’t known we were online dating.

I’m starting to feel a little disheartened, though it’s only been four days of searching. Several questions arise. How long should one stalk Craigslist for the perfect hound? And is there a better way to go about rescuing a particular breed or breed mix of dog? For all you dog owners out there, how did you go about finding the perfect four-footed mate? Any advice on the matter would be greatly appreciated.

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flickr.com photo credit: megawump1

I’m resolving to be more involved in the snacks and party offerings I bring to get-togethers next year. Like making cheese logs or cookies instead of mindlessly buying a bottle of wine. I also want to get better at giving people presents on their birthdays. I don’t do that enough. — Tabitha from “Fierce Science”

To never again fill out an end-of-the-year wrap up questionnaire for Fierce and Nerdy.  However, I doubt I’ll be able to keep this resolution, as Ernessa T. Carter is an annoyingly persistent editor. When it came time to making her contributors fill out the end-of-the-year wrap up questionnaire that you are now reading, she was like an evil galley ship master, relentlessly whipping our already bloody backs to get as much free content as possible.  — Ryan from “Fierce Anticipation”

Less US Weekly, more actual book readin’. Step one is losing the celeb gossip rag subscription. Step two is just say no to late night TiVo in bed. That one will be a bit harder to stick to. I’ve already started a book and it’s about a cat. I figured that’s a good start for me. — Robin from “Wonderfully Awful”

I am tired of making major resolutions that I never keep.  So this year, I have a couple small things in mind.  I want to take a cooking class, start an exercise routine of some kind, work harder on paying off my debt and see a career counselor or someone similar to discuss career advice. – Monique from “Political Physics”

I have a few resolutions - one is to eat more fruit. I love sweets, but I think I need to turn to nature’s candy this year! I also started yoga and trapeze in 2004. I kept with trapeze (silks aerials) but not yoga. I hope to try and stick with it more this year. I also would like to update my wardrobe - I have some clothing that I have had since high school! My goal is to try and buy more organic and USA made clothing. — Missy from “Dork Lifestyle”

To focus completely on my acting career and put all other things on the backburner. This is what I have always wanted to do with my life. Yet I got caught up in other adventures along the way. Keep it? It’s the only thing I have in my sight line. — Kaboom from “Venice Flytrap”

I resolve to see more movies this year, because movies rule so hard. And, yeah – I’m pretty committed to keeping this one.? — Jordan from “Enough Already”

To figure out how to plan a wedding because I am CLUELESS. – Jessica from “Musings on the Amusing”

Financial stability. I know it’s kind of the opposite of what the markets are up to, but I think I can do it because I’m able to slow down a bit and take stock of where I am and how I can do things. I’m not saying financial freedom, just a plan that will bring me to a better place, like, not in quite so much debt. — Gudrun from “Secret Life of a Nerd Girl”

In the past years I’ve gone all out, but this year I’m keeping it small: Get a publishing deal for my first novel, make Fierce and Nerdy the best blog in the history of ever, put 2 webisode series up on Fierce and Nerdy, birth a baby, get pregnant again, and finish my second novel. What? — etc

I am going to try to be more positive.   I need to see small things as accomplishments instead of seeing all the things I still have to do. I got this realist behavior from my mother and it always brings me down when I’m around her.  I can see that it is affecting my relationships and it has to change before I lose important people in my life. — Delia from “Chic Geek”

It’s time to kick everything up a notch: health, career, friendships, etc. A comfortable life is a safe life but offers few surprises, and I’ve been comfortable for too long. It’s time for some risky business. — Clark from “Nerd Date”

Write as often as I can, for my sanity. Now that I have my new desk that Seen got me for Xmas it’ll be much, much easier.  Thank You Seen!
Oh and to eat veggies and lean proteins and cut the sugar, wheat and beers to a minimum.  I have to; I’m a much better person when I eat right. — Amy from “Tall Drink of Nerd”

And a few of our bloggers are resolving to do the same thing. But get this, none of the matching bloggers live in the same city. Small country. Find out who matched with who after the jump…

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So what was your worst moment of 2008?

That would be a toss-up between the day our 16 yr old cat Weasel was euthanized or the night my Dad went into the hospital with Mylodysplasia Syndrome (MDS) The loss of Weasel is still tough, there are times where I cry just cause I still miss her. Dad is getting better, but sitting with him at the Oncology lab while he took his chemo treatments was definitely tough. — Amy from “Tall Drink of Nerd”

This would be work related so I will self edit to avoid losing my job. — CH from “Buy Your Geek This”

Being the 57th person to be laid off from my workplace, and knowing that if the remaining few can’t ride out this recession, the company may go out of business. It would be one thing if this was an isolated incident particular to my own life. But people all over the world are getting the pink slip and wondering how we’re gonna get by. It’s gonna get worse before it gets better. — Clark from “Nerd Date”

Recently, I found out my mom is getting a second divorce.  It was all her idea, and he and I are not even that close, but it just gave me one more reason to believe that forever is unattainable. — Delia from “Chic Geek”

Jeez Louise, there have been so many. Most of them boy related, many of them involving something that felt like heartbreak, but all of were steps in the right direction. — Gudrun from “Secret Life of a Nerd Girl”

Had an argument with a loved one via cell phone, but the backdrop was gorgeous. The roof of the Grove parking garage, with a panoramic view from hints of ocean west to downtown towers east. To the north the line of Sunset Blvd skirting the Hollywood Hills. Ever notice how clouds make mountains seem taller?  — Jeff from “Hippie Squared”

Every moment I look at my bank account. — Jessica from “Musings on the Amusing”

Breaking my collarbone for the third time in my life. I knew that this time it was going to do irreparable damage to my body and my credit standing.– Kaboom from “Venice Flytrap”

Wow. There were so many (worst moments of the year). I kinda’ wanna’ say the veritable collapse of the U.S. economy, which started a few months ago and is still sort-of in progress. Or George W. Bush still being in office. Or another year going by without anybody in the White House being held accountable for completely “missing” the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001, or for the enormity of the “mistakes” that have been made with regard to Iraq. But these are all sorta’ ongoing moments. So I’m gonna’ go with writing fifteen pages of stand-up material about Oprah, most of which’ll probably never see daylight ‘cause there’s so much of it. Either that or, in retrospect, buying a ticket for Hitman. — Jordan from “Enough Already”

My friend John died. I miss him, but know he was on this earth to teach me how to treat everyone, including myself. — Kelli from “Fierce Science”

In the summer there were a few break ins in our neighborhood. We are on a very quiet street, but it was so stressful during this time. I am glad to say we have since installed a home alarm and have not heard of any trouble since the summer! — Missy from “Dork Lifestyle”

I can remember the day…March 6th.  I went to a routine appointment with my OBGYN and she said that I was 3 centimeters dilated which was a problem since I was only 30 weeks pregnant. I was rushed to the hospital, pumped with steroids to jump start the development of my son’s lungs and hooked up to all kinds of monitors!  My husband (and mom) were both out of town.  I was scared to death and have never felt as alone! — Monique from “Political Physics”

Learning that my aunt had lung cancer.  My mother is already dealing with terminal thyroid cancer, and then to hear about my aunt…just seemed like overkill on the universe’s part. — Redheaded Stepchild

I think my depression is getting worse as I get older. This was the year I, for the first time, experienced the urge to hurt myself.  Yay 2008.  — Roya from “Fierce Foodie”

Sitting, teary eyed, in an animal hospital room as my beloved, but very sick, Labrador retriever was put to sleep– Oops, sorry. I was confusing my life with the ending of Marley & Me. I hate it when that happens. — Ryan from “Fierce Anticipation”

Puking all over myself in a friend’s car after drinking 2 bottles of wine (1 red, 1 white, NEVER MIX WINES, PEOPLE!) and various other mismatched alcoholic beverages. I managed to contain the vomit to my person, and my purse, but that was a big “Game Over” moment. I had to go home and hose myself off. — Tabitha from “Fierce Science”

And the dark moment in U.S. History that was the passage of Prop 8:

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How about now? I’m feeling pretty good while writing this. I went to Target and Trader Joe’s this afternoon and didn’t want to claw my face off. Then I bought a copy of the Watchmen which I’m going to read later. Yes. Right now is good. Tabitha from “Fierce Science”

Being offered the opportunity to become a blogumnist on Fierce and Nerdy. Not only my favorite moment of the year, but perhaps of the decade. It even rivaled the first time I had sex at the very belated age of 21. I was that excited when Ernessa asked me to contribute to this blog. Seriously. — Ryan from “Fierce Anticipation”

Naturally, it’s Doctor Who related.  For Christmas, my fiancé surprised me with a second gift: a Doctor Who Sonic Screwdriver.  My very own! — Redheaded Stepchild

My favorite moment is when my roller derby team (and ETC’s former team) the Tough Cookies won the LA Derby Dolls 2008 championships. I have been with the team since the beginning and we had never made it to champs, much less won. Skating the track while holding that massive trophy is something that will stay with me forever. — Robin from “Wonderfully Awful”

That one is easy….giving birth to my son.  Why, because it was the most incredible moment of my life, I have never been so surprised by my own strength or afraid of the realization of just how much I loved this person whom I had just met. — Monique from “Political Physics”

This is really difficult, but my comic character, Tofu Baby, made an appearance at the Flagpole Music Awards. I got to be her voice back stage as she talked to the audience with Pete McCommons, the Flagpole’s editor. She even got heckled by a local musician! — Missy from “Dork Lifestyle”

Going to Australia with my mom was the trip of a lifetime. It’s something we will always remember. I felt honored to be able to afford to take her there financially and let her experience overseas travelling for the  first time! — Kelli from “Fierce in Seattle”

Sitting next to my parents and Drew Barrymore at the May 31 Tough Cookies vs. Sirens game right after getting ejected for the first time in my Roller Derby history. It was the first game my parents had ever seen and it was my early return from a broken collar bone. I played my heart out in that game, got ejected, got the crowd behind me and had Drew Barrymore reaching over her casting director to shake my hand and personally beg me to come in and audition for her movie. Now that’s a hollywood moment. — Kaboom from “Venice Flytrap”

My favorite moment of the year was probably writing fifteen pages worth of stand-up material all about Oprah and what a sanctimonious, emotionally inverted schmuck she is. Most of it’ll probably never see daylight ‘cause there’s just too much of it, but it’s good to know that it’s there. — Jordan from “Enough Already”

Decemeber 20th, 2008… I GOT ENGAGED at Griffith Observatory in sweats... it was perfect! — Jessica from “Musings on the Amusing”

Moments contemplating moments; moments on the ocean of time (see Hippie Squared: Tide of Time and Landsick Impressions). And this: Strolling a still lively but chilly French Quarter well after dark, warmed by sazerac and absinthe, when comes the clattering of hooves. “Santa!” Elise cries, and there he is, galloping forth out of the night on a horse drawn wooden wagon, red and white suit, bushy white beard, snow-trimmed red hat with snowball tassel bouncing. “Ho ho ho!” I bellowed, thrusting out my arm in a Santa salute. “Ho ho!” I heard him exclaim ‘ere he drove out of sight.  — Jeff from “Hippie Squared”

Launching Fierce and Nerdy and finally finishing my novel were pretty damn dope, but I suppose I should say finding out I was pregnant just in case the daughter I’m incubating reads this someday. — etc

I flew across the country to help wish my great-aunt a happy 95th birthday. Frail of body but sound in mind and spirit, her smile and endlessly fascinating stories remind that we’re all connected to each other, and that life can be a journey more wondrous than we can imagine. — Clark from Nerd Date

Finding out etc is pregnant. — CH from “Buy Your Geek This”

Oh, and few of us were excited about this Obama guy. Heard of him?

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