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Dear Thursday: Why This Kid Had Better Be Awesome

As it turns out, the best thing about putting together 4 to 6 helpings of Pork Adobo is that I don’t really care to eat anything else right now. The Mac & Cheese was lovely on Tuesday, but on Wednesday a new phase of the pregnancy train had begun: 24/7 nausea.

Nausea when I got up, nausea as I drove to work, nausea as I sat through a 2-hour meeting, nausea as I answered the new writer’s many questions, nausea as I think about switching out the “breezy” current mood photo, nausea as I decide not to because I don’t have a “nauseous” current mood photo, nausea as a caught up with my friend JP, nausea as I listened to the show before it went off early to quality control, nausea as I finally took those audiobooks to the library and picked up Eclipse (the third in the Twilight series), nausea as I went through the drive-through at McDonald’s because maybe fries would help. Half-an-hour reprieve from nausea after the fries. Then nausea again as I crawled into bed and curled up with an online episode of Grey’s Anatomy (I’m way behind), more nausea as Iooked at baby center, which confirmed that this and next week are basically the worse for morning sickness.

Even the smell of cheese turns my stomach right now, so no mac & cheese. Actually, I’d prefer not to eat anything at all, but one of the most interesting aspects of morning sickness is that you can have it 24/7 and still be really hungry. In fact I’m both really hungry and nauseous as I write this.

I blame my best friend, Monique. She had no morning sickness, and made the first trimester seem like a breeze. I’ve decided to no longer take advice from her, since much like women who’ve never had period cramps and Pollyanna, she is obviously a freak of nature and not to be trusted when it comes to these things.

In addition, I’ve decided to hate Angelina Jolie, since she told a magazine with a straight face that she “loved every moment of being pregnant.” Angelina, I adored you in Wanted, but you are an asshole. I also don’t like this sock monkey, Calliope, pictured to the left, b/c according to her flickr caption, she has “never had a touch of morning sickness.” Hiss!!!

But at least I’m not throwing up. If I was throwing up, I’d really hate everybody right now.

So yeah, this is basically a post asking for morning sickness cures. And if anyone says “crackers,” I will go completely ape — though my angry ape will be really nauseous, so she will probably just stay where she is and grumble. A lot.

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Dragon Egg Credit: Sculpture – Jeff Goner; Photo – Malinda Welte
Calliope Sock Monkey: Jessica Wilson