Dear Thursday: SUBSTITUTE ME by Lori L. Tharps [Book 28 of 2010]

Sep 09, 2010 24 Comments by

Oh, I’ve been a reading fool over the last few weeks, and therefore have a backlog of books to talk about over the next few weeks, starting off with SUBSTITUTE ME by fellow Smithie, Lori L. Tharps.

Why I Decided To Read It: Ya’ll know how I like to represent for my clique, so it will probably come as no surprise that I’ll read anything by a fellow Smith College grad. Also, my editor sent me the ARC, so score!

What It’s About: A smart white woman in her 30s hires a smart (but directionless) black woman in her 30s to be her nanny.

What Makes It Different: You know, I’ve read fiction from the working mother’s perspective and I’ve read fiction from the nanny’s perspective, but I can’t ever remember reading it from both perspectives with the husband’s POV thrown in. That made SUBSTITUTE ME particularly fascinating.

What I Loved: Oh, this book did a number on me. I talked about it with just about EVERYONE and I even got up at 6am a couple of days in a row, just so I could finish reading it. I loved that I had no idea what would happen next or how it would all turn out.

What I Didn’t Like: The featured baby is a complete angel, never interrupts, doesn’t throw temper tantrums, sits there quietly while the grown folks carry out their assorted dramas. As the mother of a completely opposite 14-month-old, this made me hiss.

Writing Lessons Learned:

Give Book Clubs Something To Talk About. I  really, really want to talk about all the controversial ideas, situations, and plot points in this novel with someone. I’m sad that most of my mom friends haven’t read it yet, b/c I want to discuss what happened so bad. I also love that this novel sparked several conversations with my husband about parenthood and marriage. To a certain extent, I think that reading this book might actually make marriages stronger, in that it will get couples talking.

Give Us No One To Cheer For. As a sometimes frustrated write-at-home mom, I really wanted to identify with Kate, the working mother. But I couldn’t fully identify with her, b/c she held so many assumptions about race, class, and privilege that I did not. On the other hand, while I liked Zora, in many ways the nanny that’s better at mothering than you is every mother’s worst nightmare. I love that Ms. Tharps didn’t put her characters in good guy/bad guy cookie-cutter boxes.

The New Cautionary Tale. In many ways this book is a complex discussion about feminism and the concept of having it all. Essence Magazine described SUBSTITUTE ME as a horror novel, but I would actually describe it as a cautionary tale, one that makes you think and perhaps change your life accordingly. It also made me think about the thin lines between feminism, entitlement, selfishness, and resentment. This novel shook me to my very core. I think every working mother owes it to herself to read this book and think about the ideas within it.

To Whom Would I Recommend This Book: New Yorkers, Brooklynites, Working Moms, Nannies, Foodies, Black Women Who Travel, Starving Artists, Smithies.

Click on the cover pic to buy the book!

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Featured Image Credit: chrisjohnbeckett


Similar Posts:

*No top 5, Book Reviews, Dear Thursday, Fierce and Nerdy

About the author

In addition to running Fierce and Nerdy, Ernessa T. Carter is the author of 32 CANDLES, a romantic comedy that is totally worth buying.
  • http://twitter.com/Reads4Pleasure @Reads4Pleasure

    You already know how much I loved Substitute Me. You're right in that there's no hero or heroine. At first I was afraid it was going to be the typical nanny story, but it was such a thought provoking book.

    • ernessa

      I love that it totally defied my expectations, too! Totally not what I was expecting.

  • http://twitter.com/Reads4Pleasure @Reads4Pleasure

    You already know how much I loved Substitute Me. You're right in that there's no hero or heroine. At first I was afraid it was going to be the typical nanny story, but it was such a thought provoking book.

    • ernessa

      I love that it totally defied my expectations, too! Totally not what I was expecting.

  • loveisdope

    Read it. Loved it. As you pointed out, one of my favorite things about the book is that there are no cartoony super villains. Everyone is very real, which means they have good and bad traits that don't necessarily cancel each other out all the time. Also, I think that if this becomes a movie, Joe Manganiello (Alcide from "True Blood") should play the husband. Yep.

    • ernessa

      That's PERFECT casting! Calling Gwyneth Paltrow for Kate and Kerry Washington for Zora!

      • loveisdope

        Oooooh, good call!

    • http://twitter.com/Reads4Pleasure @Reads4Pleasure

      I'm ALL for anything Joe Manganiello!

  • loveisdope

    Read it. Loved it. As you pointed out, one of my favorite things about the book is that there are no cartoony super villains. Everyone is very real, which means they have good and bad traits that don't necessarily cancel each other out all the time. Also, I think that if this becomes a movie, Joe Manganiello (Alcide from "True Blood") should play the husband. Yep.

    • ernessa

      That's PERFECT casting! Calling Gwyneth Paltrow for Kate and Kerry Washington for Zora!

      • loveisdope

        Oooooh, good call!

    • http://twitter.com/Reads4Pleasure @Reads4Pleasure

      I'm ALL for anything Joe Manganiello!

  • Ayana

    This review was fantastically intriguing and a little but frightening all at the same time. I just ordered it for my Kindle and can’t wait to dig in.

    • ernessa

      Yes, Ayana, get on that and let me know what you think…

  • Ayana

    This review was fantastically intriguing and a little but frightening all at the same time. I just ordered it for my Kindle and can’t wait to dig in.

    • ernessa

      Yes, Ayana, get on that and let me know what you think…

  • http://welcomewhitefolks.blogspot.com carleen

    I felt the same way. Who was the bad guy? The husband? Not really. Zora? Not really. Kate? Not really. I think they all were (except the baby) somewhat. Lots to talk about!

    • ernessa

      BTW, I just put Betty in afternoon daycare. I won't say that this book influenced me to go that route as opposed to a nanny — Betty's love of other children is the official reason on record. Still…

  • http://welcomewhitefolks.blogspot.com carleen

    I felt the same way. Who was the bad guy? The husband? Not really. Zora? Not really. Kate? Not really. I think they all were (except the baby) somewhat. Lots to talk about!

    • ernessa

      BTW, I just put Betty in afternoon daycare. I won't say that this book influenced me to go that route as opposed to a nanny — Betty's love of other children is the official reason on record. Still…

  • http://www.loritharps.com Lori L. Tharps

    Thank you Ernessa for this awesome review. And you touched on the main point I wanted to make in this book, which was there are no good or bad guys in domestic dramas. Everyone brings the good, bad and the ugly to the table and how it all shakes out is about the choices we make. Angels aren't always rewarded and sinners don't always end up dead.

    • ernessa

      No, thank YOU for the thought-provoking read, Lori.

  • http://www.loritharps.com Lori L. Tharps

    Thank you Ernessa for this awesome review. And you touched on the main point I wanted to make in this book, which was there are no good or bad guys in domestic dramas. Everyone brings the good, bad and the ugly to the table and how it all shakes out is about the choices we make. Angels aren't always rewarded and sinners don't always end up dead.

    • ernessa

      No, thank YOU for the thought-provoking read, Lori.

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