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Don’t Make an Important Decision If… [Blogging on the ETC]
I’ve always wanted to be the decisive sort. To look at an issue, make a quick decision and then stand by it. Like those powerful businessmen that you’re always reading about in books.
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the course of my lifetime, it’s that I’m just not. Quick decisions often come back to bite me in the butt. And though I’ve striven (is that a word?) to figure out how to decide things faster, I most often find myself adding more DON’Ts to my already considerably long “don’t make an important decision if…” list. Here’s just a small sampling of that list:
1. Don’t make an important decision if you’re hungry.
2. Don’t make an important decision if you’re depressed.
3. Don’t make an important decision if you’re under three months or over six months pregnant.
4. Don’t make an important decision if you’re in a weirdly great mood.
5. Don’t make an important decision if you’re tired.
6. Don’t make an important decision if you’re not currently in your main time zone.
7. Don’t make an important decision it you’re angry.
8. Don’t make an important decision if you’re hurt.
9. Don’t make an important decision if you’ve had more than one drink — especially now that you’re over the age of 30.
10. Don’t make an important decision if you don’t have access to your iCalendar.
You think I’m joking, but I’m not. The truth is, I’ve learned more about making good decisions by discovering when not to make decisions. And I’m still not ever sure that I’m deciding right.
But how about you? How do you make decisions? And are you as decisive as you want to be?
Sometimes I wish I could hire someone to make my decisions for me.
Hahaha! Well, as you know, I love making decision for OTHER people … so always feel free to ask — not that you need to. It’s fun having an obnoxious writing exchange partner, right?
A Guide to a Decision:
Step 1: Figure out what you have to decide.
Step 2: Research that thing. Research the hell out of it. See what other people decided. Freak out. Get angry. Panic. Make lists and spreadsheets.
Step 3: Forget all that research stuff. Phrase problem as “I will regret it if I a) do or b) do not” whatever the thing is.
Step 4: Do the thing that will allow you to avoid regret as much as possible.
Or sometimes I just hire someone to hold a gun to my head and force me. That works, too.
Weirdly enough, I get a lot of enjoyment out of #2 at first, then I start freaking out. I’ve actually learned not to research. I either outsource the research or just ask someone I know who likes to research (usu. Monique) what he or she did in that situation and then do that thing without doing my own research. This is how I chose my first Mac computer and how I chose my daughter’s fancy preschool. Shockingly, I have almost never been burned by this method.
I completely agree!!! This blog is right on time for me…in just the past few weeks I have been in three of these situations (e.g., angry, depressed and not in my main time zone) and I was seriously considering major life changes that (a) could have been extremely detrimental and/or (b) made no sense given where I am in my life. This is some solid advice, especially the points about anger and depression.
One of the “Don’t Decide If’s” that I didn’t put on the list was, “Don’t make an important decision if you haven’t run it by Monique first.” :)
I read an interview with Jeff Bridges in Rolling Stone a few years back where he said he had a disease called Abulia, which causes one to suffer from indecision. Seen says I have Natalie Imbruglia disease, because it takes me 5 minutes to decide which kind of cereal is better for you based on the ingredients. Still decisions are made, normally the decisions I’ve made in haste have about the same rate of success than the ones I’ve pondered.
I will agree that making any decision after drinking should wait. I ended up buying death metal concert tickets this fall, after about 4 beers consumed, because it sounded like SO much fun to go with our friend who loves death metal. Ugh. No more drunky decisions.
One element I didn’t add to the post — because it didn’t really fit — is that I tend to make my best decisions when I’m super-distracted. If I have a million things going on, that’s the absolute best time to make decisions from where to go on vacation next to what cuts need to be made to my schedule. I tend to get my best work done when I’m trying to do something on my iPhone and my toddler is interrupting me every 5 minutes. Keeps me concise and efficient,