Fierce in Seattle: Another Year Under the Belt…

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a blogumn by Kelli Bielema

38 feels great!

I just celebrated my 38th birthday and I realized that I enjoy aging. Notwithstanding of this process would be my slowed metabolism (an entire sleeve of Girl Scout Thin Mint cookies can no longer be a “snack”), decreased ability to bounce back after a night of binge drinking (which I now consider 2 drinks), and the fact that my doctor recently reminded me that I am peri-menopausal (ok, I’ll admit the “no periods” part really is exciting!). Fun times!

What I have discovered is that I am more comfortable with myself than I ever have been. I care less and less about what others may think of me and care more about what I think about myself. Am I good? Decent? Honest? Caring? Giving? In years past I would ask myself if I was cute enough? Thin enough? Funny enough? Worthy? The sorts of insecurities about physical appearance and social acceptance I have left behind. And strangely enough, it has come to fruition at a time when I am in top physical shape and I have a network of friends that goes from Seattle to Sydney.

When I ponder back on what I thought I wanted with my life when I was 5, 16, 30, it amazes me how experiences can alter those ideals. I have a good overarching theme of what I want for my life now, but I like to be surprised to a degree. I’ve got a free spirit, a creative mind, a willing attitude and total blind faith that everything will work out the way it’s meant to be. As the adage goes, with age comes wisdom. I’m certainly not Mensa-smart (and am somewhat obsessing on whether or not that hyphen belongs there), but the knowledge I’ve gained about myself has opened me up to learning more about other people, places and possibilities.

I’m taking more risks (not the bungee jumping variety). I recently heard this: “When was the last time you did something for the first time?” I love it. It’s akin to “do something every day that scares you.” Now, fear is not a big motivator for me, but proving to myself that I can dive into the unknown and possibly fail, but at least say I did it–that’s major.

What about you? Do you find yourself getting more confident as you age? Or is getting old the pits?