Future So Bright: The Holiday Blues Dec23

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Future So Bright: The Holiday Blues


A blogumn by Josh Grelle

holidayblueOh man it’s Christmas time — oh wait perhaps I should rephrase that, aww man it’s Christmas time. Why the holiday blues you ask? Well Christmas just isn’t the same anymore now that I’m not a little kid. The holiday season used to be something more than buying presents and being taken advantage of by ads and sales exploiting Santa Claus and just Christmas in general. But now… Well, to aid in my quest to combat my holiday blues I have compiled a list of tips to get us through the holidays.

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re probably serving pie.

2. Throw caution to the wind: “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is to sing out loud for all to hear.”- Elf. Even if you’re not the best singer in the world, give it a try. Who cares if you embarrass yourself. It’s Christmas.

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

4. Set aside time to watch your favorite childhood Christmas movie or special, be it Rudolf or A Charlie Brown Christmas, whatever it is , it is worth it to make time to watch it again. In fact I am watching The Polar Express as I write this article.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it. Hello? And under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food..

6. Set realistic spending limits for your holiday shopping . Nothing increases your holiday blues than spending all of your money on gifts for friends/ coworkers you don’t even like (or family members that you never see). The easiest way not to stretch your wallet is to get creative. Look really hard for deals or just make gifts. Homemade cookies are both cheap and well appreciated.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies or pralines in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They’re like a really awesome sale . If you leave something you want behind, you’re never going to see them again.

8. Every day when you wake up in the morning remind yourself “Hey it’s Christmas time, and it’s gonna be fricken awesome.”

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but, avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. Finally while walking on the street or in the store or in your home or anywhere actually, make sure you say Merry Christmas to anyone you see. Even if they don’t celebrate Christmas it shouldn’t matter. It’s the thought that counts. Guy who checks your bags.. “Merry Christmas,” waiter.. “Merry Christmas,” old lady crossing the street “Merry Christmas!”

– Josh G.
Merry Chirstmas


Flickr.com Photo Credit: DaDaAce