Musings on Amusing: Did I Offend You?
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A blogumn by Jessica Glassberg
A journey through the struggles, insecurities and over-analyzing that make a comic funny
This past Sunday night, I performed at the comedy show, “Sunday, Sunday, Sunday” in Westwood. One of the comics was onstage discussing how he tried to get excused from jury duty by pretending he was racist. Fearing getting jumped by the Latinos and African Americans serving on the jury, he decided to say he had a deep hatred for Filipinos….
The audience laughed…
The comic was not Filipino, nor Asian, nor Spanish…he was Caucasian… Should the audience have been offended? Was it not just as “offensive” to assume he would be jumped by the Latinos and African Americans?
After he finished with his set, two Asian girls left the theater…
Were they offended?
Was it just a coincidence and they had to meet some friends down the street?
We’ll never know.
Are we racist for wondering why they left?
Was I offended?
No…I was more upset that I have been telling my own jury duty joke for years than by the fact that he singled out Filipinos. The joke was funny because it was unexpected…not because it was specifically about Filipinos.
I am a comedian. I am a female. I am a brunette. I am only child. I am five foot-three and three quarters. I am Jewish. I am from Long Island. I am a graduate of Carnegie Mellon University. I am a lover of Nilla Wafers and a hater of exercise. I am a self-proclaimed half-bulimic…I binge, I just don’t purge.
There are innumerable categories that can encompass who I am. And, as a comedian, there is an unwritten law that I have free reign to discuss, poke fun at, or shine a light on ‘my own’ categories.
But is that really true?
If I tell a joke about always being hungry and dirty and say that it stems from a fear of using an oven and taking showers in relation to ‘my tribe’s’ experience with the Holocaust…many people will be offended, but would it be more or less so because I am Jewish?
If a non-Jewish comic jokes about how cheap Jews are…I might be offended. Honestly, it would all depend on how it was delivered and more importantly, how funny it was. If you’re going to make jokes about stereotypes, they’d better be damned funny and put a new spin on the stereotype…or don’t bother.
After being made fun of for various reasons, from flat-chested-ness to being opinionated, I made the decision that I am completely comfortable making fun of myself in any incarnation…as a female, as a Jew, as a nerd, but I avoid crossing the line of mocking what is outside my own self-deprecating boundaries.
Personally, I strive to write material that still makes you think, and (I hope) laugh without dropping an “F-bomb” every five seconds, discussing the inner workings of my clitoris or making broad generalizations about race, religion or sex. I like to think I tell personally specific and intelligent stories with punch lines. Perhaps I am fooling myself. (Self-deprecation…party of one…I’ll take a table by the window.)
But does ‘going blue’ and getting ‘racial’ mean you’re not intelligent? I think the works of Pryor and Carlin at the very least would suggest otherwise. Have you seen the incomparable Mel Brooks’ masterpiece, “Blazing Saddles?”
To some extent, are stereotypes, stereotypes for a reason?
Are Asians bad drivers?
Are Asians good at math?
Do African Americans have bad credit?
Are African American males really well endowed?
Do Mexicans have lots of babies at a young age?
Do Mexicans work harder than others?
Are all Italians in the Mob?
Are Italian women the best cooks?
Are all Catholic girls who went to Catholic school sluts?
Are Catholics more pious than others?
Are females not funny?
Are females better multi-taskers?
Are the “good” stereotypes just as detrimental as the “bad” ones?
As long as a joke is told cleverly…does it matter?
Can stereotype jokes be used to shine a light on how horrible stereotypes actually are?
If you are going to watch a comedy show… political correctness should be left at the door the minute you order the first of your two-drink minimum.
This does not exempt the Michael Richards of the world from blurting out racial epithets just because he/she holds a microphone. If you’re going to cross the racial line…you better have a damn good punch line to back it up.
If a joke is written and told well…funny is funny…no matter how “offensive.
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Jessica is a FEATURED performer at the LOS ANGELES COMEDY WALK DOWNTOWN on THURSDAY 9/18You “walk” (as the name would indicate) venue to venue, checking out a few different shows going on at once.She’ll be doing 2 sets: (8:50PM and 9:30PM)
Check out this link for info on parking, location and to print your FREE ticket.
Jessica,
I think your rule of thumb is a good one. I think we’re safest if we stick to joking about groups we are a part of. That said, I think that if a comic is trying to take a fresh look at race and/or racism and not just getting a cheap laugh at the expense of the group being mentioned that makes all the difference. I guess I always follow my gut. And if the comic is being mean, particularly to someone less powerful in our society, I find I don’t find it funny.
My two cents.
See you around the scene.
(By the way, if two negatives equal a positive, are Asian women excellent drivers? – Not part of my act. Just thought of it because of your “Musing”. Offensive?)
Jessica,
I think your rule of thumb is a good one. I think we’re safest if we stick to joking about groups we are a part of. That said, I think that if a comic is trying to take a fresh look at race and/or racism and not just getting a cheap laugh at the expense of the group being mentioned that makes all the difference. I guess I always follow my gut. And if the comic is being mean, particularly to someone less powerful in our society, I find I don’t find it funny.
My two cents.
See you around the scene.
(By the way, if two negatives equal a positive, are Asian women excellent drivers? – Not part of my act. Just thought of it because of your “Musing”. Offensive?)
Orlando…
Thanks for your 2 cents…
And I feel like with the right delivery – the Asian women joke could be a good one. Again, it depends on context. If it were a random non sequitur – could be great…or totally awkward. If it comes after a rant about equality…could also fit in the ‘shine a light’ sense ….who knows.
I think it’s also a level of comfort and personality that shines through on stage.
Hope to see you soon!
Orlando…
Thanks for your 2 cents…
And I feel like with the right delivery – the Asian women joke could be a good one. Again, it depends on context. If it were a random non sequitur – could be great…or totally awkward. If it comes after a rant about equality…could also fit in the ‘shine a light’ sense ….who knows.
I think it’s also a level of comfort and personality that shines through on stage.
Hope to see you soon!
I have a dream that one day jokes will be judged not by the color of it’s stereotype, but by the content of it’s hilarity. Your musings are right on. If you have to question whether or not one “should” be offended by a joke, then it’s probably offensive, and not that funny. Me personally, I’m not easily offended, but I am tired of the overused stereotypes that have become “ok” in our society (and by society, I really mean the comedy world-we should strive to be better than that). Now that being said, I’m at more Bar Mitzvahs than I am at Bar-B-Ques, so I am learning a lot more about my Jewish Bretheren. Now I get a lil squimish when I hear certain things. Mostly because of what I think OTHERS might think. That’s all for now!!!!
Keep with the funny,
~el~
I have a dream that one day jokes will be judged not by the color of it’s stereotype, but by the content of it’s hilarity. Your musings are right on. If you have to question whether or not one “should” be offended by a joke, then it’s probably offensive, and not that funny. Me personally, I’m not easily offended, but I am tired of the overused stereotypes that have become “ok” in our society (and by society, I really mean the comedy world-we should strive to be better than that). Now that being said, I’m at more Bar Mitzvahs than I am at Bar-B-Ques, so I am learning a lot more about my Jewish Bretheren. Now I get a lil squimish when I hear certain things. Mostly because of what I think OTHERS might think. That’s all for now!!!!
Keep with the funny,
~el~
Jessica, I have been debating about responding to your blog because I do not want to seem like I am attacking your point of view or just being overly sensitive. But I do feel like I need to comment.
I can totally understand your point of view….a comedy show is probably not the best place to go if I’m looking for uber-political correctness.
But, as an African American woman, I just cannot agree that anything goes or is fair game when it comes to comedy. I do not agree that “If a joke is written and told well…funny is funny…no matter how offensive.” There are some racial jokes that are just not funny. I don’t care if it is Michael Richards telling the joke or Chris Rock, in my opinion there are some lines they just should not be crossed.
I guess I think that the ability to laugh at anything is a luxury that as an African American in the US today I do not have.
Jessica, I have been debating about responding to your blog because I do not want to seem like I am attacking your point of view or just being overly sensitive. But I do feel like I need to comment.
I can totally understand your point of view….a comedy show is probably not the best place to go if I’m looking for uber-political correctness.
But, as an African American woman, I just cannot agree that anything goes or is fair game when it comes to comedy. I do not agree that “If a joke is written and told well…funny is funny…no matter how offensive.” There are some racial jokes that are just not funny. I don’t care if it is Michael Richards telling the joke or Chris Rock, in my opinion there are some lines they just should not be crossed.
I guess I think that the ability to laugh at anything is a luxury that as an African American in the US today I do not have.
To Eljaye…
I concur with your ‘dream.’ And yes, I’m tired of the “usual’ stereotypes being the easy go-to punchlines…not only does it come across as offensive, but it’s just plain hacky…
To Monique…
I’m glad you commented – I want to hear others’ opinions.
I would agree with you that not everything is fair game when it comes to comedy…for each audience member and each comic’s comfort level.
And people will always have their own boundaries they are not willing to cross.
I have never been an African American and can not speak to that end.
But I know as a female – there are certain ‘jokes’ or more specifically intentions of jokes that I do/ do not find offensive where other women will feel the opposite.
The set up I mentioned about the Holocaust would offend innumerable Jews…while others will find it funny.
I think I tried to express and question…IS everything fair game? And I do not think it is.
But, to me, with the right combination of creativity, intelligence and originality no topic should be a sacred cow.
Sense of humor in itself is one of the most subjective things…and you can’t please everyone or make them laugh.
To Eljaye…
I concur with your ‘dream.’ And yes, I’m tired of the “usual’ stereotypes being the easy go-to punchlines…not only does it come across as offensive, but it’s just plain hacky…
To Monique…
I’m glad you commented – I want to hear others’ opinions.
I would agree with you that not everything is fair game when it comes to comedy…for each audience member and each comic’s comfort level.
And people will always have their own boundaries they are not willing to cross.
I have never been an African American and can not speak to that end.
But I know as a female – there are certain ‘jokes’ or more specifically intentions of jokes that I do/ do not find offensive where other women will feel the opposite.
The set up I mentioned about the Holocaust would offend innumerable Jews…while others will find it funny.
I think I tried to express and question…IS everything fair game? And I do not think it is.
But, to me, with the right combination of creativity, intelligence and originality no topic should be a sacred cow.
Sense of humor in itself is one of the most subjective things…and you can’t please everyone or make them laugh.
Jessica, thank you very much for your response. I really appreciated it.
Jessica, thank you very much for your response. I really appreciated it.
I believe – as if anyone cares – that funny is funny. many people in this pc world are too, well, pc. i often discuss topics on stage that are uncomfortable, blue, etc and many people laugh, many don’t, but that’s cool, i don’t think one’s comedy should be for everyone. oh, and never underestimate good comic musings about one’s clitoris. i often discuss the innner workings of my clitoris and it kills.
I believe – as if anyone cares – that funny is funny. many people in this pc world are too, well, pc. i often discuss topics on stage that are uncomfortable, blue, etc and many people laugh, many don’t, but that’s cool, i don’t think one’s comedy should be for everyone. oh, and never underestimate good comic musings about one’s clitoris. i often discuss the innner workings of my clitoris and it kills.
Getting an audience’s reaction is a big part of what we, as comics, strive for. Something is inside all comics who seek for validation from a group of total strangers…
I go for jokes that I enjoy telling …and hope that others enjoy the delivery as well…
Like I mentioned to Monique…no one’s comedy is universal..for every person who loves one joke…there will be plenty who just don’t ‘get it.’
And I’m not opposed to blue comedy as a rule- I just prefer when it’s told cleverly instead of as excuse to drop f-bombs and say clitoris.
Getting an audience’s reaction is a big part of what we, as comics, strive for. Something is inside all comics who seek for validation from a group of total strangers…
I go for jokes that I enjoy telling …and hope that others enjoy the delivery as well…
Like I mentioned to Monique…no one’s comedy is universal..for every person who loves one joke…there will be plenty who just don’t ‘get it.’
And I’m not opposed to blue comedy as a rule- I just prefer when it’s told cleverly instead of as excuse to drop f-bombs and say clitoris.
I think you’re cute, for a Jew broad.
Seriously though, “race” is the nuclear bomb of comedy.
And just like nuclear bombs everybody (or country if we were talking about literal nuclear weapons) thinks they’re ready for them and NEED to use them.
Very few are prepared to do what you need to do when you tell a “race” joke which is: a) tell the truth b) come with a new version of said truth with a fresh angle from your specific, unique perspective c) find a way to make your point out of love or out of trying to foster an understanding rather than just some blanket statement like, “white people suck and have killed their way to the top for like, um, ALL of recorded history”.
I haven’t always found ways to do the love and understanding thing in my act but I’m working on it every day.
Unfortunately, if a comic can get an unearned laugh off some poorly fictionalized and demeaning portrayal of a cheap Jew, thieving black, or blowing up Arab, then the problem doesn’t just rest with the comic does it? Audiences lap that stuff up and they’re the boss.
They dictate what we do to a great extent. And as we all know bosses are some of the most retarded people around. Damn I bet I just offended someone.
I think you’re cute, for a Jew broad.
Seriously though, “race” is the nuclear bomb of comedy.
And just like nuclear bombs everybody (or country if we were talking about literal nuclear weapons) thinks they’re ready for them and NEED to use them.
Very few are prepared to do what you need to do when you tell a “race” joke which is: a) tell the truth b) come with a new version of said truth with a fresh angle from your specific, unique perspective c) find a way to make your point out of love or out of trying to foster an understanding rather than just some blanket statement like, “white people suck and have killed their way to the top for like, um, ALL of recorded history”.
I haven’t always found ways to do the love and understanding thing in my act but I’m working on it every day.
Unfortunately, if a comic can get an unearned laugh off some poorly fictionalized and demeaning portrayal of a cheap Jew, thieving black, or blowing up Arab, then the problem doesn’t just rest with the comic does it? Audiences lap that stuff up and they’re the boss.
They dictate what we do to a great extent. And as we all know bosses are some of the most retarded people around. Damn I bet I just offended someone.
Thanks, Ed…you’re not a bad dude for a brownie…
See…that was out of LOVE…as I know your Jew broad comment was ;)
I agree that to a great extent we work for ‘our bosses…’ the audience. And many audiences are not the brightest and would take sexually/ racially charged ignorance over a well structured intelligent joke any day of the week…
And yes…people, in general (not anyone reading this of course) are dumb…
But we as the performer, still have a responsibility, if for no one else than ourselves, (b/c Lord knows we love ourselves…in sick, twisted, self-hating ways) to project an image we feel comfortable with.
Thanks, Ed…you’re not a bad dude for a brownie…
See…that was out of LOVE…as I know your Jew broad comment was ;)
I agree that to a great extent we work for ‘our bosses…’ the audience. And many audiences are not the brightest and would take sexually/ racially charged ignorance over a well structured intelligent joke any day of the week…
And yes…people, in general (not anyone reading this of course) are dumb…
But we as the performer, still have a responsibility, if for no one else than ourselves, (b/c Lord knows we love ourselves…in sick, twisted, self-hating ways) to project an image we feel comfortable with.
If you’ve seen my act you know that I agree we must hold ourselves to a higher standard. If you’ve been in a comedy club in the last 15 years you know most performers don’t or simply aren’t talented enough to hold themselves to any lofty standards. We both know talent is not required to be a professional entertainer but knowledge of WHAT WORKS is.
And hacks are not evil, they are just savants when it comes to finding out what “works”. Audiences being retarded have put many a hack’s kids through college. Hell, Carrot Top’s GRANDKIDS will be filthy rich. And hacks with garbage race material aren’t going anywhere because dumbass audiences aren’t going anywhere. When the aforementioned Carrot Top’s great-great-great-great- grandkids go to the comedy club, they’re going to see some guy in a shiny jumpsuit talking about this type of alien “walks like this” and this other alien “walks like THIS”. The comic will then ease into some “super funny and true” material about why the Xenonites from Canphor III “can’t drive in hyperspace.” Or “what’s the deal with those fools on Aurelius 7? Why they be trippin’?” And the audience will be HOWLING their wild approval. There will be some brilliant comic waiting to get onstage after this space retard and you know what? The brilliant comic will probably do poorly.
It is what it is. I’m down to fight the power with ya G-Berg but hacks, racists, and dummies all have the survival skills of a roach with Green Beret training. They will be here when we are long gone.
(No faith in humanity…party of one…no hostess I don’t need the window table ’cause all that’s outside are more dumbasses)
If you’ve seen my act you know that I agree we must hold ourselves to a higher standard. If you’ve been in a comedy club in the last 15 years you know most performers don’t or simply aren’t talented enough to hold themselves to any lofty standards. We both know talent is not required to be a professional entertainer but knowledge of WHAT WORKS is.
And hacks are not evil, they are just savants when it comes to finding out what “works”. Audiences being retarded have put many a hack’s kids through college. Hell, Carrot Top’s GRANDKIDS will be filthy rich. And hacks with garbage race material aren’t going anywhere because dumbass audiences aren’t going anywhere. When the aforementioned Carrot Top’s great-great-great-great- grandkids go to the comedy club, they’re going to see some guy in a shiny jumpsuit talking about this type of alien “walks like this” and this other alien “walks like THIS”. The comic will then ease into some “super funny and true” material about why the Xenonites from Canphor III “can’t drive in hyperspace.” Or “what’s the deal with those fools on Aurelius 7? Why they be trippin’?” And the audience will be HOWLING their wild approval. There will be some brilliant comic waiting to get onstage after this space retard and you know what? The brilliant comic will probably do poorly.
It is what it is. I’m down to fight the power with ya G-Berg but hacks, racists, and dummies all have the survival skills of a roach with Green Beret training. They will be here when we are long gone.
(No faith in humanity…party of one…no hostess I don’t need the window table ’cause all that’s outside are more dumbasses)
I hear ya, Greer.
I was not a big fan of the movie, “Idiocracy,” it had so much potential, but just missed the boat…but the basic idea that eventually the earth will ONLY be filled with the not-so-intelligent, hit the nail on the head. If for no other reason to watch it – the opening sequence is really interesting.
Yes – there are times I have to played to the lowest common denominator in the room.
And a huge part of the addiction to stand-up is the validation of the crowd…but I also know – I have to enjoy my own material.
And I’ve certainly been to shows where the space retards outshine the wittiest comics, but I’m glad the witty comics are out there doing their thing.
I hear ya, Greer.
I was not a big fan of the movie, “Idiocracy,” it had so much potential, but just missed the boat…but the basic idea that eventually the earth will ONLY be filled with the not-so-intelligent, hit the nail on the head. If for no other reason to watch it – the opening sequence is really interesting.
Yes – there are times I have to played to the lowest common denominator in the room.
And a huge part of the addiction to stand-up is the validation of the crowd…but I also know – I have to enjoy my own material.
And I’ve certainly been to shows where the space retards outshine the wittiest comics, but I’m glad the witty comics are out there doing their thing.