Oh, It’s Tuesday: Great Expectations
I was reading a really interesting piece in Jezebel the other day about how if we’ve pinned a lot of (perhaps impossible) hopes and dream on President Elect Obama, then we’ve become even more irrational about Michelle Obama. In a few words, we expect her to be nothing less than perfect.
That means she needs to be fashionable, every hair needs to be in place, she has to answer every question intelligently in interviews, she can’t raise her voice (even to Sasha an Malia), she has to stay in shape, she can’t lose her temper like ever, crying for reasons other than extreme happiness is a no-no, she has to give terrific speeches, she must appear as if she adores her husband, she must put her children first before anything else, and she has to give up her high-powered executive career, even though she holds a graduate degree.
Now, I think that many women find the career thing to be the most egregious on this list. But having just given up a really nice job myself, I will say this: one of the most difficult things about the American workforce is that “success” often means longer hours and, in my opinion, unreasonable job demands that do not lend well to family life.
I doubt that as a well-paid executive Michelle was able to spend as much time with Sasha and Malia as she would’ve liked. And I feel a little sad that President Elect Obama will probably miss many of his children’s best moments because of his job demands.
No, the career thing is the least of my worries on my list. Though, if she, like (the wife of the former prime minister Tony) Cherie Blair, advocated for better parental leave laws, I would be thrilled.
Getting back to my original point, though, looking at this impossible list of First Lady “musts,” I can’t think of a single woman who fits this description, and I know a ton of wonderful women. So if and when Michelle messes up, before going after her, we should perhaps go back to this list and asks ourselves if we ourselves could ever pull if off perfectly. If the answer is no, then cut her some slack. If the answer is yes, then by all means go ahead. Throw the first stone.
I can't even imagine what the Mrs. is going to have to sacrifice. Not just time from her husband, but her career, her ambitions….that's it. I'm never marrying a man with potential. (Hasn't been a problem so far………….!)
I can't even imagine what the Mrs. is going to have to sacrifice. Not just time from her husband, but her career, her ambitions….that's it. I'm never marrying a man with potential. (Hasn't been a problem so far………….!)
In the 2 years that I was in L.A. before I met CH, I moved 6 times. By the time I moved in with CH, I only had two big suitcases, and had become an expert at getting packed in under 2 hours. It was a very sparse way of living but I loved it. And I'm a little proud to say that I've lived for a time in every major part of L.A. — save Downtown — go figure.
In the 2 years that I was in L.A. before I met CH, I moved 6 times. By the time I moved in with CH, I only had two big suitcases, and had become an expert at getting packed in under 2 hours. It was a very sparse way of living but I loved it. And I'm a little proud to say that I've lived for a time in every major part of L.A. — save Downtown — go figure.
In the 2 years that I was in L.A. before I met CH, I moved 6 times. By the time I moved in with CH, I only had two big suitcases, and had become an expert at getting packed in under 2 hours. It was a very sparse way of living but I loved it. And I'm a little proud to say that I've lived for a time in every major part of L.A. — save Downtown — go figure.
I do wonder if she will go the Hillary way, be a good wife for the next eight years and then they will both work on her career. She's a very smart women and who knows maybe it will be Michelle for president in 2020.
I do wonder if she will go the Hillary way, be a good wife for the next eight years and then they will both work on her career. She's a very smart women and who knows maybe it will be Michelle for president in 2020.
Ernessa, you are so on point. I worry about unreasonable expectations for both Barack and Michelle. I got into an argument with an older black man in the elevator the week after the election because I refused to agree with him that Barack was the Messiah! Talk about irrational!
And you know the issue about work life balance is troubling. Having just had Sekou 7 months ago and struggling to balance him, Brian, work, civic stuff, advocacy, etc. is already starting to take a toll. You only have so much bandwidth, it forces you to make tough choices!
Ernessa, you are so on point. I worry about unreasonable expectations for both Barack and Michelle. I got into an argument with an older black man in the elevator the week after the election because I refused to agree with him that Barack was the Messiah! Talk about irrational!
And you know the issue about work life balance is troubling. Having just had Sekou 7 months ago and struggling to balance him, Brian, work, civic stuff, advocacy, etc. is already starting to take a toll. You only have so much bandwidth, it forces you to make tough choices!
Ernessa, you are so on point. I worry about unreasonable expectations for both Barack and Michelle. I got into an argument with an older black man in the elevator the week after the election because I refused to agree with him that Barack was the Messiah! Talk about irrational!
And you know the issue about work life balance is troubling. Having just had Sekou 7 months ago and struggling to balance him, Brian, work, civic stuff, advocacy, etc. is already starting to take a toll. You only have so much bandwidth, it forces you to make tough choices!
Ernessa, you are so on point. I worry about unreasonable expectations for both Barack and Michelle. I got into an argument with an older black man in the elevator the week after the election because I refused to agree with him that Barack was the Messiah! Talk about irrational!
And you know the issue about work life balance is troubling. Having just had Sekou 7 months ago and struggling to balance him, Brian, work, civic stuff, advocacy, etc. is already starting to take a toll. You only have so much bandwidth, it forces you to make tough choices!