Oh, It’s Tuesday: I (sheepish smile) Joined a Church
My church. Photo Credit: jinjian liang
I haven’t really talked about this extensively on the blog or IRL since doing it, but here goes…
Don’t drop dead of shock, old friends (especially those who know me mostly as a playwright), but I joined a church. No, not a church of writing, or a church of reason, or a church of awesome — though I like to believe that I belong to all of those churches.
I joined a church-church. Yes, seriously.
But Ernessa, my old friends ask, what about hat play you wrote about Joseph slapping Mary around because she wants to confess that Jesus isn’t really the son of God but a product of rape?
Yeah, I wrote that.
Or that play you wrote about God being a suicidal manic-depressive drag queen who’s only mad at the devil because they went through a really bad break-up?
Yeah, I wrote that, too.
Or that play you wrote about —
Yes, yes, that one, too. But the main point is that I joined a church. I wouldn’t say I changed my mind, but I did make a decision. And when you live in a world of reason, I do believe that belief is a decision.
I’ve never been an atheist — though I do understand the appeal and don’t believe that religious belief or ceremony are a prerequisite for living a moral life. I’ve never met an atheist who wasn’t an upstanding citizen, but awful Christians make the news like every other day.
In some ways I do believe that there will always be a nagging voice of reason in the back of my head that wonders if belief isn’t an opiate or a self-imposed ball and chain to keep us from growing up too fast through science or our cowardly way of coping with the fact that we’re all going to die. Ever seen Logan’s Run?
In fact, my belief system might be different from others’ belief systems, but we’ll get into that on Thursday.
I thought and thought on it, and for whatever reason, at the end of the day, I do believe in a higher power. It doesn’t necessarily make sense, but I decided to go with it. Also, when we first started on our journey towards children, CH wanted to join a church, so I told him that I would attend church with him if he could find one that
1) Believed in gay marriage
2) Wasn’t hippie-dippy or cultish. Basically, I wanted traditional songs along with the progressive ones.
3) Didn’t preach that everyone who didn’t believe as they believed would go to hell.
And lo and behold, he found such a church in the Hollywood United Methodist Church. CH got baptized there and we’re getting Betty baptized there very soon, which has me thinking a lot about organized religion and how I grew up with it, rejected it and then found myself embracing it again.
Like I said, we’ll get more into belief systems on Thursday. But for now, I’m wondering how other people who grew up in the church and left it ended up coming back to the church. Was it a difficult time in your life that had you walking through your new churches doors? Or were you like CH and starting a family made you want to be part of a spiritual family? Either way, I’m looking forward to your comments.
Good for you! I myself am a Christian, but also struggle reconciling my behavior with my faith at times. I'm not here to preach or anything, but I think it's completely awesome that you shared it with us and didn't care what anyone else thought. I mean, in the end I don't feel like any of us should be ashamed of what we do or believe (except for that time I hurled my cat into a ceiling fan- accidental, but shameful nonetheless.) Anyways, despite that brief segue into possible animal abuse, keep doing what you're doing and as always, I'll keep enjoying reading about it! :)
This is why I wanted to make our belief systems into a second blog. I, too, am having trouble reconciling my faith with my beliefs. I nod my head when our reverend talks about acceptance of all, but I just don't think it would be practical or safe to accept a homeless person into my home. I find it difficult to want to be a good person but to also not want to do things that I find unpleasant even if they are good. I also have trouble eating most vegetables for the same reason. :)
Good for you! I myself am a Christian, but also struggle reconciling my behavior with my faith at times. I'm not here to preach or anything, but I think it's completely awesome that you shared it with us and didn't care what anyone else thought. I mean, in the end I don't feel like any of us should be ashamed of what we do or believe (except for that time I hurled my cat into a ceiling fan- accidental, but shameful nonetheless.) Anyways, despite that brief segue into possible animal abuse, keep doing what you're doing and as always, I'll keep enjoying reading about it! :)
This is why I wanted to make our belief systems into a second blog. I, too, am having trouble reconciling my faith with my beliefs. I nod my head when our reverend talks about acceptance of all, but I just don't think it would be practical or safe to accept a homeless person into my home. I find it difficult to want to be a good person but to also not want to do things that I find unpleasant even if they are good. I also have trouble eating most vegetables for the same reason. :)
Back when I was planning a wedding, this is the church that I belonged to! Is Pastor Ed still there? He was so nice. He did the pre-marriage classes for me & my ex. I must say that I picked the church based on exactly the criteria you were looking at. ____My view on religion is that it's extremely personal to everyone. My viewpoints have changed and I no longer go, but I do not condemn it either. I grew up going to Sunday school up until my teens and think it was a great foundation for my youth. In recent years I've discovered my own spirituality in other ways, but am happy be in favor of groups like the Methodist church. It's nice to see more progressive attitudes rather than hellfire & damnation. Hallelujah!
Now it's Reverend Kathy, but I've met Ed, and he's a wonderful man. I've been thinking about how much I used to enjoy Sunday School lately and I hope Betty will, too. Another thing that I like about HUMC is that children attend Sunday School while the adults attend church. Growing up, I attended Lutheran school, Lutheran service AND Sunday school. That was too much, and confusing. But more about that on Thursday.
Back when I was planning a wedding, this is the church that I belonged to! Is Pastor Ed still there? He was so nice. He did the pre-marriage classes for me & my ex. I must say that I picked the church based on exactly the criteria you were looking at. ____My view on religion is that it's extremely personal to everyone. My viewpoints have changed and I no longer go, but I do not condemn it either. I grew up going to Sunday school up until my teens and think it was a great foundation for my youth. In recent years I've discovered my own spirituality in other ways, but am happy be in favor of groups like the Methodist church. It's nice to see more progressive attitudes rather than hellfire & damnation. Hallelujah!
Now it's Reverend Kathy, but I've met Ed, and he's a wonderful man. I've been thinking about how much I used to enjoy Sunday School lately and I hope Betty will, too. Another thing that I like about HUMC is that children attend Sunday School while the adults attend church. Growing up, I attended Lutheran school, Lutheran service AND Sunday school. That was too much, and confusing. But more about that on Thursday.
I took a break from religion for a while. I didn't break up with it, I just took a break. Then I realized that the reason I was on the break was because I was looking for my church to give me a social outlet, not a spiritual one, and had gotten wrapped up in disdain for the eccentric members of the congregation and those who I didn't feel were paying enough attention to how awesome I am. After some ego correction, religion and I made up and have played nice ever since.
I took a break from religion for a while. I didn't break up with it, I just took a break. Then I realized that the reason I was on the break was because I was looking for my church to give me a social outlet, not a spiritual one, and had gotten wrapped up in disdain for the eccentric members of the congregation and those who I didn't feel were paying enough attention to how awesome I am. After some ego correction, religion and I made up and have played nice ever since.
That is such a great comment, Anne, and it's funny, b/c I always phrase my years away as a break-up. More on Thursday, but I just wanted to let you know that I related to your comment especially.
That is such a great comment, Anne, and it's funny, b/c I always phrase my years away as a break-up. More on Thursday, but I just wanted to let you know that I related to your comment especially.
I would have to add #4 to your list: church services must not last more than 1 hour. I'm Baptist and currently don't go to church except for major holidays (ala Easter and Christmas) but I have to say that as a child those LONG services (and folks "catching the spirit" ) as a child is what killed it for me.
I would have to add #4 to your list: church services must not last more than 1 hour. I'm Baptist and currently don't go to church except for major holidays (ala Easter and Christmas) but I have to say that as a child those LONG services (and folks "catching the spirit" ) as a child is what killed it for me.
Hahaha! I hear you girl. I would've never come back to church if I had been Baptist or anything that required me to spend more than an hour in the pews.
Hahaha! I hear you girl. I would've never come back to church if I had been Baptist or anything that required me to spend more than an hour in the pews.
My experience as a child at church scared me out of religion. When I was 5 or so, my aunt occasionally took my sister and I to her (rather fervently passionate, near cultish) church for Sunday school. I thought it was a good playtime while adults went upstairs and was oblivious to the religious aspect. Then one visit we had a common service with the adults. Service was in our paternal language (which neither my sister nor I understand) and the pastor kept pointing to the congregation then at the figure of Jesus nailed and bleeding on the cross behind him. I had no idea what he was saying but in my 6-year old mind, I figured I was next so I burst into a hysterical crying fit and then my sister started. We left immediately and I've never been to church since (except for weddings, funerals, and as tourist). Recently, I've become slightly more spiritual but can't bring myself to subscribe to one particular religion (I still get scared when I think of that cross from my church experience). Maybe in my next life, I will have a happier introduction to church!
My experience as a child at church scared me out of religion. When I was 5 or so, my aunt occasionally took my sister and I to her (rather fervently passionate, near cultish) church for Sunday school. I thought it was a good playtime while adults went upstairs and was oblivious to the religious aspect. Then one visit we had a common service with the adults. Service was in our paternal language (which neither my sister nor I understand) and the pastor kept pointing to the congregation then at the figure of Jesus nailed and bleeding on the cross behind him. I had no idea what he was saying but in my 6-year old mind, I figured I was next so I burst into a hysterical crying fit and then my sister started. We left immediately and I've never been to church since (except for weddings, funerals, and as tourist). Recently, I've become slightly more spiritual but can't bring myself to subscribe to one particular religion (I still get scared when I think of that cross from my church experience). Maybe in my next life, I will have a happier introduction to church!
My then-fiance and I started looking for a church… I guess because we felt like we were transitioning into a new phase of our lives and wanted a little more structure and ritual to accompany this serious decision we were making. We also wanted a place that would enable us to be more active in politics and our community (so we picked the one that the IRS targeted because of anti-war sermons), and a place with great music. We weren't really boomerangers – my husband grew up Presbyterian but didn't really "leave" the church, just kind of didn't go for a while; I didn't grow up in a church. I'm still getting used to it, as a matter of fact.
Did you guys consider All Saints in Pasadena? Very similar! We love it. Funny – we used to live in Hollywood and commute to Pasadena for church – you're doing the reverse.
My then-fiance and I started looking for a church… I guess because we felt like we were transitioning into a new phase of our lives and wanted a little more structure and ritual to accompany this serious decision we were making. We also wanted a place that would enable us to be more active in politics and our community (so we picked the one that the IRS targeted because of anti-war sermons), and a place with great music. We weren't really boomerangers – my husband grew up Presbyterian but didn't really "leave" the church, just kind of didn't go for a while; I didn't grow up in a church. I'm still getting used to it, as a matter of fact.
Did you guys consider All Saints in Pasadena? Very similar! We love it. Funny – we used to live in Hollywood and commute to Pasadena for church – you're doing the reverse.