Political Physics: Did Interracial Adoption Play a Role in the Return of Little “D”?

Oct 06, 2009 20 Comments by

So last week my mom called and she was pissed.  You know that kind of pissed where she starts talking as soon as you answer the phone as if you should just know what the heck she is talking about.  Here is a recap:

My Mom:  I cannot believe that….how could she just give the baby back…..if it were a white baby she would not have just given the baby back.  This is ridiculous!

Me (my mom is still talking in the background):  What baby?!? Mom, I have no idea what you are talking about.

My Mom (more annoyed):  Do you EVER check Facebook?

Me:  Yes, but apparently not as much as you do.

My Mom (in a huff): I’ll email you the article!  You really need to check Facebook more often!

My mom was referring to Anita Tedaldi, a writer who originally told the story of her decision to adopt the child on The New York Times’ Motherlode blog. Tedaldi, already a mother of five, adopted the boy (referred to as “D”) who was found abandoned by the side of a road in South America.  The child had a few health issues, including a flattened head from lying down for too long in the same position, and coprophagia, which involves the child eating his own feces, a condition rare in humans. Tedaldi wrote that the real issue was that the child “wasn’t attaching” to his new family, and that she herself was not quite bonding with the adopted child.

I must admit that my first reaction was much like my mother’s.  Especially after I read Lisa Belkin’s blog on The New York Times’ Motherlode entitled “Terminating an Adoption” where Anita Tedaldi talked about how the issues with D were affecting her marriage.  Huh?

So this is D’s fault?  What?!

But for me the issue is even deeper.  I am wondering if Anita Tedaldi would have had the same trouble “bonding” with D if he had been white (with the same issues)?  And if race did play a role, what does that say about interracial/transracial adoption?

Interracial adoption is defined when a child’s race and/or ethnicity are different from that of both parents when a couple adopts, or from that of a single parent when only one adopts.  According to a PBS, interracial adoption increased in the 1970’s following the Vietnam War.  After the war, “many of the children left in orphanages were biracial, fathered by American G.I.s, so an organization called ‘Operation Babylift’ brought over 2,000 children to the United States.”  In 1994, Congress passed the Multiethnic Placement Act (MEPA) prohibiting an agency or entity that receives Federal assistance and is involved in adoptive or foster care placements from delaying or denying the placement of a child on the basis of the race, color, or national origin of the adoptive or foster parent, or the child involved and enacted an amendment, the Interethnic Adoption Provisions (IEP) which forbids agencies from denying or delaying placement of a child for adoption solely on the basis of race or national origin.  A major goal of the MEPA was to reduce the disproportionate number of children of color in the foster care system, particularly African American children.

According to the Adoption Institute, “African American children who come into contact with the child welfare system are disproportionately represented in foster care, and are less likely than children of other racial and ethnic groups to move to permanency in a timely way.  Approximately 64% of children waiting in foster care are of minority background and out of all foster children waiting for adoption 51% are Black and 11% are Hispanic.  Moreover, African American children, as well as Native American children, also have lower rates of adoption than those of other races and ethnicities.”

However, according to the Adoption Institute “the enactment of the MEPA and the IEP has not resulted in equity in achieving permanency for African American children awaiting adoption. The adoption rates of Black children (as well as Native Americans) have remained consistently lower than those of other racial/ethnic groups.  Data indicates that there have been small increases in transracial adoptions of Black children from foster care – rising from 17.2% in 1996 to 20.1% in 2003; however, this growth in transracial adoptions has not resulted in Black children being equally represented among children adopted from foster care relative to their proportion of children awaiting adoption.”

And while interracial adoptions can provide much-needed homes for boys and girls who may not otherwise have them, it is important to address the potential challenges in this growing practice in order to best serve everyone involved, especially the children.

Although, interracial adoption in itself does not produce psychological or social maladjustment problems in children – 75% of interracially adopted children adjust well in their adoptive homes – according to the Adoption Institute several studies have shown that a considerable proportion of interracially adopted children suffer from significant mental health issues due to challenges in coping with being “different,” issues developing a positive racial and/or ethnic identify and an inability to cope with discrimination.

Then again even a small reduction in the number of children remaining in the system is significant, particularly when you look at the statistics of children aging out of foster care, e.g., 27% of males and 10% of females are incarcerated within 12 to 18 months, 50% are unemployed and 37% never finish high school.

So even with the risk of a child not being adopted or even worse, the risk of little D being “returned,” interracial adoption is a viable alternative.  As a mother of a biracial child I have to believe it is possible to raise a well-adjusted kid, difference in race notwithstanding. But you need to acknowledge that race is a real issue in this country and even if you are “color blind,” the world isn’t.  So make the extra effort to prepare your child for life outside of your house.

If you adopt a child of a different race or ethnicity, then it is your responsibility to ensure that the child gains an understanding of their culture.  If you adopt a child whose nationality speaks a different language, then it is your responsibility to ensure that the child learns their language.  You need to celebrate your child’s culture, talk about race and ensure that your child has an opportunity to socialize with people from their race or ethnic group.

You need to go into interracial adoption with a realistic understanding of the role race plays in the US, with eyes wide open and know that you are responsible for even more than you would be if your adoptive child looked just like you.

Even before my husband, Brian, and I got married we spent a lot of time talking about what it meant to be an interracial couple and the challenges we would face.  More importantly, we talked a lot about raising biracial children in a world that was far from “postracial.”

Listen, am I sure that race played a role in Anita Tedaldi’s decision?  Of course not.  To be fair, D had some significant health challenges.  But I cannot ignore my mom and the nagging feeling in my gut, which both say that if D had maybe looked more like her and her five children she would have thought more about her decision.  But this is all just conjecture.

But perhaps if Anita had thought it through a bit more and come into the adoption eyes wide open, I would not have been moved to write this blog.


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Fierce and Nerdy, Monique King-Viehland

About the author

Monique is an urban redeveloper, wife and mother living in Trenton, NJ. She has a Master of Science in Public Policy from the Heinz School at Carnegie Mellon University and a Bachelor of Arts degree from Smith College where she graduated with honors. Her background is in community and economic development and she has spent the last ten years working on urban redevelopment, neighborhood revitalization and public policy issues in the nonprofit and public sectors. Her career has included stints as a gubernatorial aide and a White House Intern and most recently head of a redevelopment agency. Monique is a wannabe policy wonk and pundit who loves blogging about various political issues.
  • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

    I don't know that I necessarily believe race had anything to do with this. There are many cases of people rejecting their own children b/c of mental issues, and many cases of adoptions just not working out. When we were considering the possibility of adoption, I was afraid of the same issue. How about if I liked a kid at first but found that I was never able to "warm up" to them.

    My questions are "why was this woman allowed to adopt a boy out of South America w/o some kind of fostering process? Also, did she receive any counseling on dealing with his issues before doing so? I don't think the boy is to blame, but I don't necessarily think all the blame lies with the mother either. If this were a case of a boy w/o considerable health issues or with a woman who had adopted or even cared for a child w/ considerable health issues, I would agree w/ your mom. But knowing as little as I do about the case, I can only fairly conclude that this was a tragic mismatch.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      E. I agree that the "system" is not without blame. From what i could find, Anita did go through an adoption process which included screening, counseling, etc. However, in all fairness, I am not sure that she or the adoption agency were aware of the severity of D's issues before he was placed.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

    I don't know that I necessarily believe race had anything to do with this. There are many cases of people rejecting their own children b/c of mental issues, and many cases of adoptions just not working out. When we were considering the possibility of adoption, I was afraid of the same issue. How about if I liked a kid at first but found that I was never able to "warm up" to them.

    My questions are "why was this woman allowed to adopt a boy out of South America w/o some kind of fostering process? Also, did she receive any counseling on dealing with his issues before doing so? I don't think the boy is to blame, but I don't necessarily think all the blame lies with the mother either. If this were a case of a boy w/o considerable health issues or with a woman who had adopted or even cared for a child w/ considerable health issues, I would agree w/ your mom. But knowing as little as I do about the case, I can only fairly conclude that this was a tragic mismatch.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      E. I agree that the "system" is not without blame. From what i could find, Anita did go through an adoption process which included screening, counseling, etc. However, in all fairness, I am not sure that she or the adoption agency were aware of the severity of D's issues before he was placed.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

    I wanted to get that first comment out of the way before hijacking your blog. Yes again. But I think there's an elephant in the post that we're not addressing. Interracial adoptions are on the rise partly due to the fact that 30% of the children in the foster care system are black and the vast majority of black people just aren't adopting those children. Our children are clogging up the system b/c we're just not stepping up. At what point does chastising white people about the way they raise children of color when we ourselves refuse to adopt black children in as high of numbers become hypocritical?

    When trying to conceive, I would cruise adoption sites to reassure myself that we would still be able to have a family if we weren't able to surmount our fertility issues. There were so many kids of color up for adoption, it was heartbreaking. And now that we have Betty, I can still see their pictures staring back at me. I'm afraid to go on the sites anymore, b/c I know many of those pictures will still be up there over a year later.

    So now, I've decided that if I'm not willing to adopt now that IVF has worked, m/b I shouldn't be so hard on those that are OR instead of complaining about these people, we should actively do something to help them raise the children we're unwilling to adopt: offer advice and love and communication as opposed to judgment.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

    I wanted to get that first comment out of the way before hijacking your blog. Yes again. But I think there's an elephant in the post that we're not addressing. Interracial adoptions are on the rise partly due to the fact that 30% of the children in the foster care system are black and the vast majority of black people just aren't adopting those children. Our children are clogging up the system b/c we're just not stepping up. At what point does chastising white people about the way they raise children of color when we ourselves refuse to adopt black children in as high of numbers become hypocritical?

    When trying to conceive, I would cruise adoption sites to reassure myself that we would still be able to have a family if we weren't able to surmount our fertility issues. There were so many kids of color up for adoption, it was heartbreaking. And now that we have Betty, I can still see their pictures staring back at me. I'm afraid to go on the sites anymore, b/c I know many of those pictures will still be up there over a year later.

    So now, I've decided that if I'm not willing to adopt now that IVF has worked, m/b I shouldn't be so hard on those that are OR instead of complaining about these people, we should actively do something to help them raise the children we're unwilling to adopt: offer advice and love and communication as opposed to judgment.

  • http://www.AdvocatePublications.com Mirah Riben

    I beleive the major factor in the Anita T. case and all disrupted adoptions is lack of proper counseling on expections. Because of the privitaized entrepreneurial way adoption is handled in the US is handled by baby brokers who are untrained in child welfare or social work- just like the sale of merchandise. .One sells a car or a washing maching to anyone who can pay the price tag without concern for how the product will be cared for. And, if you don't like it – return it!

    Most unfortunately, children are being handed over in the same manner. Three major publicized cases involve children being given by adoption brokers to pedophiles who wanted them for the purpose of abusing them and marketing photos online.

    Approximately 14 children adopted from Russia into the US have been murdered after experiencing extreme abuse and turture. Children adopted internationally are more proe to be abused or DUMPED by their adopters who seem to be totally ill-prepared for parenting institutionalzed children. My latest book has an entire chapter on this subject – "When Forever is not Forever"

    It is also very interesting to note another trend that has always fascinated me in my 30 years of researching adoption. Americans are far more likely to adopt a brown skinned child from South or central America than they would a Puerto Rican or Mexican American child from US foster care. They will now adopt African children from Ethiopia and elsewhere in Africa, but ignore African American children in foster care.

    There are 129,000 children in US foster care (of a total of half a million) who COULD be adopted…but people like Anita who are applauded for doing a good deed INITIALLY – ignore the needs of these kids. Why? Why are they stigmatized as "damaged" and the damage of orphanage care and the high likelihood of FAS among Eastern European children is ignored? And while we ignore our own children in need, so too are truly needy orphans worldwide ignored as unscrupulous baby brokers steal and kidnap younger babies in Guatemala, Vietnam and even China to be trafficked for international adoption. So tempting and easy is the money in human trafficking, that drug dealers prefer kidnapping for adoption.

    This too is prejudice at work, as is the fact that children are actually PRICED by adoption agencies based on ther skincolor, age and health — an accepted practice every bit as repugnant as slavery!

    If it is true that nations are judged by how they treat their most vulnerable we rank very poorly. Very, very poorly indeed. Babies are sought as a commodity, their best interests eclipsed by money and greed.

    Mirah Riben, author
    The Stork Market: America's Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry
    http://www.AdvocatePublications.com

    Mirah Riben

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

      I agree with nearly everything you've said about adoption – especially the bits about more counseling being needed. America has a few problems when it comes to adoption and I often wonder if that's why people choose to adopt from other countries. I think for infertiles there is a certain solace in knowing that if you adopt from another country then that child is yours. They won't be taken away if their mother stays clean for a month and asks for her kid back only to fall off the wagon again, so that the child ends back up in the foster care system (this actually happened to an acquaintance of mine). Also adopting an American child can get very, very expensive and emotionally messy. Though I would adopt from this country myself, I can see why others would choose to go abroad.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Mirah, thank you very much for your comment. The information your provided was extremely interesting and I think right on point. The major point that really resonated for me, is one that I have taken issue with for quite some time is that Americans would much rather adopt brown and black babies from abroad rather than adopt the thousands of brown and black babies right here in the US. I have always struggled with why that is, but never looked at it from the perceived "damage" angle. I have often wondered if the negative perceptions and racial stereotypes of African Americans and Latinos in the US that prohibit these folks from adopting nationally somehow evaporate in their minds when they are looking at children beyond our borders who may come from the same ethic background.

  • http://www.AdvocatePublications.com Mirah Riben

    I beleive the major factor in the Anita T. case and all disrupted adoptions is lack of proper counseling on expections. Because of the privitaized entrepreneurial way adoption is handled in the US is handled by baby brokers who are untrained in child welfare or social work- just like the sale of merchandise. .One sells a car or a washing maching to anyone who can pay the price tag without concern for how the product will be cared for. And, if you don't like it – return it!

    Most unfortunately, children are being handed over in the same manner. Three major publicized cases involve children being given by adoption brokers to pedophiles who wanted them for the purpose of abusing them and marketing photos online.

    Approximately 14 children adopted from Russia into the US have been murdered after experiencing extreme abuse and turture. Children adopted internationally are more proe to be abused or DUMPED by their adopters who seem to be totally ill-prepared for parenting institutionalzed children. My latest book has an entire chapter on this subject – "When Forever is not Forever"

    It is also very interesting to note another trend that has always fascinated me in my 30 years of researching adoption. Americans are far more likely to adopt a brown skinned child from South or central America than they would a Puerto Rican or Mexican American child from US foster care. They will now adopt African children from Ethiopia and elsewhere in Africa, but ignore African American children in foster care.

    There are 129,000 children in US foster care (of a total of half a million) who COULD be adopted…but people like Anita who are applauded for doing a good deed INITIALLY – ignore the needs of these kids. Why? Why are they stigmatized as "damaged" and the damage of orphanage care and the high likelihood of FAS among Eastern European children is ignored? And while we ignore our own children in need, so too are truly needy orphans worldwide ignored as unscrupulous baby brokers steal and kidnap younger babies in Guatemala, Vietnam and even China to be trafficked for international adoption. So tempting and easy is the money in human trafficking, that drug dealers prefer kidnapping for adoption.

    This too is prejudice at work, as is the fact that children are actually PRICED by adoption agencies based on ther skincolor, age and health — an accepted practice every bit as repugnant as slavery!

    If it is true that nations are judged by how they treat their most vulnerable we rank very poorly. Very, very poorly indeed. Babies are sought as a commodity, their best interests eclipsed by money and greed.

    Mirah Riben, author
    The Stork Market: America's Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry
    http://www.AdvocatePublications.com

    Mirah Riben

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/ernessa ernessa

      I agree with nearly everything you've said about adoption – especially the bits about more counseling being needed. America has a few problems when it comes to adoption and I often wonder if that's why people choose to adopt from other countries. I think for infertiles there is a certain solace in knowing that if you adopt from another country then that child is yours. They won't be taken away if their mother stays clean for a month and asks for her kid back only to fall off the wagon again, so that the child ends back up in the foster care system (this actually happened to an acquaintance of mine). Also adopting an American child can get very, very expensive and emotionally messy. Though I would adopt from this country myself, I can see why others would choose to go abroad.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Mirah, thank you very much for your comment. The information your provided was extremely interesting and I think right on point. The major point that really resonated for me, is one that I have taken issue with for quite some time is that Americans would much rather adopt brown and black babies from abroad rather than adopt the thousands of brown and black babies right here in the US. I have always struggled with why that is, but never looked at it from the perceived "damage" angle. I have often wondered if the negative perceptions and racial stereotypes of African Americans and Latinos in the US that prohibit these folks from adopting nationally somehow evaporate in their minds when they are looking at children beyond our borders who may come from the same ethic background.

  • Ayana

    I occasionally read a blog written by a white woman who has 4 kids, (3 boys who she gave birth to, and a daughter she adopted from Haiti). She also adopted a son from Haiti, but ended up not keeping him. She's written about her experiences really thoughtfully on her blog at http://www.anymommyoutthere.com/. Monique, you should check it out.

    Ayana

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Ayana, thank you so much for the link. I read a couple of the posts and I found the blog to be extremely thoughful and heartfelt. It was clear to me that the decision she made was not an easy one. She also had an interesting take on the Anita Tedaldi situation. For anyone who is interested in a different perspective, I would suggest checking out this blog.

  • Ayana

    I occasionally read a blog written by a white woman who has 4 kids, (3 boys who she gave birth to, and a daughter she adopted from Haiti). She also adopted a son from Haiti, but ended up not keeping him. She's written about her experiences really thoughtfully on her blog at http://www.anymommyoutthere.com/. Monique, you should check it out.

    Ayana

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Ayana, thank you so much for the link. I read a couple of the posts and I found the blog to be extremely thoughful and heartfelt. It was clear to me that the decision she made was not an easy one. She also had an interesting take on the Anita Tedaldi situation. For anyone who is interested in a different perspective, I would suggest checking out this blog.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

    E, no problem I think this is on topic. According to Adoption.Com, " census studies indicate that blacks adopt at about the same rate as whites, but to successfully place all the black children available for adoption, experts estimate blacks would need to adopt children at three times the rate of white families."

    I am not sure if you saw the recent article last April in Newsweek entitled, "Raising Katie: What adopting a white girl taught a black family about race in the Obama era," about an African American social worked named Phyllis who adopted a three-year old white child named Katie. It talks about the issues the family is facing raising little Katie in a racially charged America. And then there is the recent article in the NYT about NFL player DeMarcus Ware and his wife Taniqua's adoption of a white child. Some long-standing opponents of transracial adoption argue that though unanticipated, this is another reason why transracial adoption will actually hurt black children in the foster care system as they are passed over by black families.

    What do you think?

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Oh and on a separate, but interesting note. According to the article Phyllis Rider, Katie's new mother, is the former president of the Baltimore chapter of the National Association of Black Social Workers and "she joined her colleagues in condemning the adoption of black children by white families as "cultural genocide"—a position she still holds in theory, if not in practice." I wonder how she reconciles that belief – even in theory – given her decision to adopt Katie.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

    E, no problem I think this is on topic. According to Adoption.Com, " census studies indicate that blacks adopt at about the same rate as whites, but to successfully place all the black children available for adoption, experts estimate blacks would need to adopt children at three times the rate of white families."

    I am not sure if you saw the recent article last April in Newsweek entitled, "Raising Katie: What adopting a white girl taught a black family about race in the Obama era," about an African American social worked named Phyllis who adopted a three-year old white child named Katie. It talks about the issues the family is facing raising little Katie in a racially charged America. And then there is the recent article in the NYT about NFL player DeMarcus Ware and his wife Taniqua's adoption of a white child. Some long-standing opponents of transracial adoption argue that though unanticipated, this is another reason why transracial adoption will actually hurt black children in the foster care system as they are passed over by black families.

    What do you think?

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/MMKV MMKV

      Oh and on a separate, but interesting note. According to the article Phyllis Rider, Katie's new mother, is the former president of the Baltimore chapter of the National Association of Black Social Workers and "she joined her colleagues in condemning the adoption of black children by white families as "cultural genocide"—a position she still holds in theory, if not in practice." I wonder how she reconciles that belief – even in theory – given her decision to adopt Katie.

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