Procrastinate on This [Friday Edition]

1. WARNING: Do not, not, NOT look at this SeaWorld penguin cam unless you want to lose at least 20 minutes. We made the mistake of showing it to our daughter right before bedtime, and immediately got sucked into a group thrall, from which we weren’t released until a penguin accidentally knocked over the camera. It is so dangerous. [Discovery Seaworld Penguin Cam]

2. I would love to see what the 2100s look like for myself, but alas the intelligence and possible economic gap make me hesitant to get on board with cryogenic freezing, even if they did get it to the point where unfreezing would 100% work. This is all to say I really appreciated this “The Economic Problems with Cryogenically Freezing Your Body” post. [i09] 

3. All work and no play make Woody a very dull doll. If you clink on one link in this batch of procrastination, please make it this TOY STORY-THE SHINING mash-up one. It’s like a deliciously evil movie nerd gift. [The Mary Sue]

4. This is the best use of body paint I have ever seen. One of the pics is slightly NSFW, though, so if your ultra-conservative boss is standing nearby, maybe don’t click on the link. [LikeCool]

5. A really interesting possible advance in fertility. Basically scientists might have found a way to make our ovaries “live forever.” [Jezebel]

6. Need to get inspired for that big project you’ve been contemplating? Read this “12-Point Program for Absolutely, Positively, %1000, No-Fail Success” by Jesse Thorn. [Transom]

7. Love this “Are You a Slut” flowchart, which is almost as ridiculous as slut-shaming itself. [Mother Jones]

8. Speaking of slut shaming … The tagline of the foreign film, TURN ME ON, DAMMIT, asks, “How come there are so many films about teenage boys who want to have sex, and this is the only one about a teenage girl who wants to have sex?” As if to prove its point, here’s the cloying, indie version of the trailer released in the U.S., which tells one story. And below is what I’d call the “real” trailer, complete with sub-titles, which tells a much funnier one. In both cases, the trailer is slightly NSFW, due to a masturbation scene.