Procrastinate on This [Friday Edition]

1. This writing advice from C.S. Lewis (who wrote the very first book that ever sent me into a complete book thrall, THE LION, THE WITCH, AND THE WARDROBE), is both excellent and still “write” on-point. [io9]

a. Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn’t mean anything else.

b. Always prefer the plain direct word to the long, vague one. Don’t implement promises, but keep them.

c. Never use abstract nouns when concrete ones will do. If you mean “More people died” don’t say “Mortality rose.”

d. In writing. Don’t use adjectives which merely tell us how you want us to feel about the thing you are describing. I mean, instead of telling us a thing was “terrible,” describe it so that we’ll be terrified. Don’t say it was “delightful”; make us say “delightful” when we’ve read the description. You see, all those words (horrifying, wonderful, hideous, exquisite) are only like saying to your readers, “Please will you do my job for me.”

e. Don’t use words too big for the subject. Don’t say “infinitely” when you mean “very”; otherwise you’ll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite.

Because why not? via LikeCool

2. The We Love Fine store (aka the best place on Earth to get Steampunk Hello Kitty tees) is hosting a Jem & the Holograms Design Contest. Meanwhile, I once again curse the fates for not blessing me with any kind of design talent. [WeLoveFine.com]

3. Apparently, NASA is introducing a mentoring program for girls interested in science.¬†Oh, I am so gotdang jealous of today’s tweens! [The Mary Sue]

4. The good news is that THE ART OF WAR is getting a fictionalized, sci-fi graphic novel makeover. Now you know I’m going to be all over that! The bad news is that we’ll have to wait until July 31, 2012 for it to drop. I think the new rule should be that nothing is announced until we are actually able to buy it, because I’m becoming increasingly unable to function in a world in which all of my desires aren’t instantly gratified. Anyway, click on the link for the pre-order. [THE ART OF WAR by Kelly Roman]

5. If you know me well, you know I love me some “tear porn” — BENJAMIN BUTTON, THE COLOR PURPLE, STEEL MAGNOLIAS — I love a good cry at the movies. And apparently I’m not alone. According to a newish study: “It turns out watching tragic stories unfold, while sad in the moment, actually causes us to reflect on our important relationships and boosts our happiness in the short run.” Ooh, TITANIC, for the win! [Jezebel]

6. If you do one thing this weekend, please, please, please make sure to listen to awesome remix of “Sexual Healing” by Dirty Synthesizer. And by the way, how am I just now really hearing the line, “Please don’t procrastinate, it’s not good to masturbate.” Oh, Marvin, you naughty, boy!

7. And … I just realized that I have absolutely no Passover or Easter mentions in this post. Oops! Sorry, dudes, I’ll totally make it up to you in 2013. Til then HAPPY SPRING HOLIDAYS!

8. Um, wait, a clever concept indie, and the cast isn’t entirely white? Wha??? Let it be summer right now, cuz I’m going to watch the heck out of SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED, starring Aubrey Plaza from PARKS & RECREATION and Nick (whose name I’m way too lazy to look up) from NEW GIRL.