Project Runway Season 10: Episodes 3 and 4 [Runway Rundown]

Well kids, it has been a looooong two weeks over here at Fierce and Nerdy with our little vacay in full effect and it appears we have A LOT to talk about in regards to that little show Project Runway. There were bitchy comments, “helpful” advice, people crying, people leaving, and even some frustrated and difficult former contestants in the mix. At times I must have been huffing some spray paint from all my personal art projects going on at the time, but I even adored the look of Kenley when she strutted the runway… *gag.

As always, go watch this shit on your DVR’s if you have yet to catch up cause i’m about to spoil the whole damn thing for you if you haven’t watched the shows yet. Or check my previous rundowns here. Now strap yourselves in ladies and ladies, cause we got two weeks worth of crazy to talk about!

First order of business – Week Three: The Emmy Challenge… Our designers started out this week each plucking a key out of a bag to a ridiculously overpriced car (I’m guessing) and were paired up according to who shared keys to the same car. The lackluster presentation of this whole thing made it a useless product placement mess that frankly could have been dispensed with more easily by using the tried and true method of the big oversized buttons in a velvet bag. “Designers, I’d like to introduce “Some forgettable white guy,” and the new “shiny forgettable white guy car” that is sponsoring this challenge…” *ugh

While some people enjoyed the mix of their teams, two individuals were horrified… Elena was matched up with Buffi. Loosen up Elena, it looks like you are gonna have a coronary and you haven’t even picked out your fabric yet. Jeesh! At least Buffi is good to go and amenable unlike some of these other scissor snipping cows. An interesting pairing to say the least would have to be the assigned group of Mon Chi Chi (Kooan) and Gremlin (Gunnar.) I never knew such opposing creatures could work so well together, but I still hated their look.

Each team of two was paired up with former female contestants with the winner getting to attend the Emmys with their client wearing their gown. These bitches all wanted to get their ass to the Emmys, but their clients seemed even more hungry for that chance, so we all knew some sparks were gonna fly. I wasn’t surprised to see a pretty girl like Anya there, but Kenley? Oy vey… isn’t there a pouting convention she is supposed to be at?

The middle was a bit of a blur with Elena freaking out on Buffi, Gremlin annoying the shit out of everyone, Mon Chi Chi feeling sad and quiet, and the former contestants getting a little snippy. All in all though there were some really good looks produced for these ladies… and then there were two teams that missed the mark entirely.

While the look of Andrea and Christopher was utterly forgettable, him throwing her under the bus during their critique was not. I have never seen a contestant turn on a dime so quickly and just pick up and hurl their teammate under the wheels, that I was sitting their with my jaw on the floor through most of it… What. A. Byatch. BUT! I must say Andrea was a little waffly and frankly I am not the biggest fan of her work so I wasn’t about to lose sleep over that one.

Raul, Alicia and the fugly dress

Our bottom team this week: Raul and Alicia… Girls that was one fugly dress, and I am amazed Mila didn’t rip it off her body and walk that runway naked while the dress lay in flames behind her cause I wouldn’t be caught dead on national TV in that frumpy garment. In the end Raul was sent packing in a “lesser of two evils” kind of elimination. Frankly they both should have been given a ticket home cause neither of them is living up to the level of some of the other designers.

Ven and Fabio's sweet thing

Winning this week was the team of Ven and Fabio… Quelle Surprise, the judges are just eating Ven’s work up. I must say they deserved to win if only for the reason they managed to make Kenley look like a million bucks! That bitch looked so innocent and sweet that frankly, this may have just been a really good costume.

Sidenote: Why the hell do they have a guest judge on the panel who has never been to the Emmys? *C’mon Guys!

Robbed this week was the team of Dmitry and Melissa who made a gorgeous dress for former contestant April. She looked like a hip modern Katherine Hepburn in that slinky silver gown and frankly the longer I look at that damn thing I wish the judges could have taken their Ven Goggles off long enough to appreciate the difficulty of their garment and just how much it reflects the client in a whole new unexpected way.

OK, now on to Week Four’s challenge… Jesus children, we start out the episode with Andrea getting up in the middle of the night and leaving the show. (*quiet golf clap) The other contestants are stunned, but you could tell she was sick of the childish bullshit, and didn’t want to be subjected to any more of that group. I can’t say I blame her. I have to agree with Ven here… This is not the best way to act as a teaching professional. Nobody likes a quitter, Andrea, and that is gonna haunt you for the rest of your life girl.

The challenge this week is the sometimes surprisingly good Michael Kors Challenge. The designers must create a garment that is ready to wear and will work for a “woman on the go,” and transform easily from a day to night look. According to Gremlin that means “No Wrinkles,” to me it means an outfit that combines comfort and style but can also be a good cocktail look, but hey what do I know?

WAIT EVERYBODY! Mon Chi Chi has something to say….. We’re waiting Kooan…. “I…I…Just have not been happy…I need to be happy and will go now…bye bye.” Oh girl, fine see you later too! Anybody else?Anybody feel the need to bail cause if you bitches are gonna hop off this boat you better do it now or else you’re going down with the ship! The designers spent the next five minutes teary and falling apart for the camera. “Oh God why did we have to lose those sweet innocent souls?!!!! Oh look they have silk georgette for 3.50 a yard!” Ok, now back to your regularly scheduled program.

Everyone did the predictable grabbing grays and blacks and creamy tones of fabric, but Buffi grabbed what can only be described as material for a Saved By The Bell themed pillowcase. You could almost see the crosshairs of the judges guns fall on her the minute she started sewing. Christopher just wanted to help and offered some sage advice to her about changing out the fabric… but girl, you don’t do that on Project Rungay Chrissy Pants! Walking over and calling a fellow contestant’s look resort wear is not helpful criticism. Don’t get all shocked when the girl thinks you are a byatch for saying it, cause I had a couple of choice words, a head flip and a “no she di’int” thrown your way while watching. Your backstabbing, offensive ways are cracking through your little facade Gremlin #2 so you best be careful cause one of those quiet ones might just take you out.

After a brief moment of consideration the producers added up the revenue from advertising and realized they had to bring back at least one contestant so they wouldn’t lose an extra episode, so they invited Raul back. Raul sauntered in with big dreams and bigger words about how they just hadn’t seen what he can do yet. Listen up Widows Peak, you need to actually be sketching and sewing right now, not trying to impress your fellow designers… the judges are the ones you need to impress, oh and me of course.

Sonjia's winning dress

After more furious sewing and time management issues, we reached the judging relatively unscathed. Sonjia was the winner this week with a very pretty “knot” dress. I liked the drape of it but it didn’t really have too much of a presentation for me to declare it the winner. Dimitry’s look was crafted impeccably and the strapping across the chest was done with perfection. Truthfully I think his look should have taken the cake. Also cute this week was Fabio’s look, even if it was a little pedestrian. It was nice to see somebody utilizing some pattern for God’s sake! This season has had too many damn black, white and grey dresses I want to just scream! Let’s hope we get a color challenge soon, God knows that will eliminate Elena.

Buffi's loser

Buffi's loser

Losing out this week we had Buffi with her pink drapey frock. Yup, saw that coming a mile away. I had to agree it was badly designed and badly executed but I am sad to see the only redeemable personality leave the show. She has a fun sense of style, a sweet demeanor and a strong head on her shoulders. I’m excited to see what she does next but this really wasn’t the scenario for her to excel… this show just doesn’t seem to jive with more punk/ funky aesthetics. Raul was a close second with his hideous pants and frumpy long vest so I expect to see him drop like a fly in the next few rounds.

Next up: Screaming, a team challenge, some sewing, and some more screaming… Looks promising. Tune in tonight on Lifetime TV and catch my rant tomorrow right here at Fierce and Nerdy!