Project Runway Season 10: The Finale! This Is No Time To Be Petulant! [Runway Rundown]

Well dear readers, we have come to the end of yet another season of PROJECT RUNWAY. This season boasted about having the best group of designers yet as it was celebrating it’s tenth season on the air. Do you agree? I certainly don’t, but I did find a few gems in the murky waters of this season.

Per usual I’m sure you already know the drill but if you haven’t seen the final episode and keep reading i’m gonna spoil it for you…so get your ass to a TV, go back and reread all my snarky columns and end here where we talk about how it all went down.

Now first things first, I went back to my original column this season to see what my first impressions were of our designers based on their initial audition/ interview footage and it is funny how spot on it was with some of the problems I saw within each of their collections, even if I was dead wrong on who would end up in the finale. Take a look:

Christopher Palu

Well, the judges gave him a “Maybe” during his interview and I have to say I agree… but it should have just been a No. We know he made it to the show, but until we see him get his hands on a challenge, all I saw was a lot of black and some leather and taffeta. Not much to go on, dear Christopher… I sense some Auf’in in your future.

Dmitry Sholokhov [left]

I’m seeing a lot of deconstructed pieces as well as architectural garments. I’m intrigued. The judges gave him a “maybe” but his work is far better than Christopher’s.

Fabio Costa[right]

Hey look, a wearable sheet! #yawn Hey look, a chunk of ugly fabric that turns into a hat, or is it a scarf? #doubleyawn

Melissa Fleis [left]

Black. Modern. Leathers. Not too gimicky. Hand dyed and hand sewn pieces. Nice stuff, but there are colors other than black… If she can play with some prints and colors I bet I’ll fall in love with her stuff!

So did I nail their issues with one glance or what?

I find it interesting that two of the top contestants were actually just “maybes” when entering the competition. They both certainly did grow from the experience, and I love an underdog story, but all in all our little designers each had some wins and some losses in their collections this go round.

Unlike most season’s where you can tell the obvious top two, from the moment these designers and their collections hit the runway last night this was anybody’s game.

The designers were still giddy from last week’s episode where they discovered they all get to show at Fashion Week, but the realization quickly set in that they each had to tweak their collection to win it. Tim gave them a shopping trip at MOOD with three hundred dollars to fix any glaring errors they could and we were off on a frenzy of decision making.

Scissors went flying, fabric was ripping, and Christopher was dragging his sullen feet again, putting off decisions he should have made before he even got back to NYC.After a quick make-up consultation with Billy B, they were off to talk about the styling of hair… This is where shit got strange people.

Dmitry was talked into a horrendous idea by some little queen with too much time on her hands and a gift card to the craft store. “We can use this product and apply silver leaf into the ponytail,” the crazy bitch said.

Dmitry ate it up. I half-expected with the next designer’s consultation for him to say, “First we are going to dunk their head in glue and them roll them in some trash and kitty litter.” Tim seemed mystified by it, and Christopher began showing his bitchy mean girl side by saying, “I hope he uses it ALL!”

Hey Christopher, do you know that you come off as a mean little bitch of a boy? His other flippant remarks about Melissa’s choice of Blood Red leather showed his true colors. He comes off fake sweet to people but is anyone buying it? He sounds so insincere in everything he says. Tim said it best when he was calling him to the work room, “Christopher, this is no time to be petulant!”

After toasting some champagne and looking over their designs one last time, we launched into the finale at Lincoln Center! Let’s sidebar for a second and talk about how amazing Heidi looked last night wearing barely anything but a dress made of some strips of sparkly golden fabric. She is single, guys, and she hasn’t looked better! Damn! Take that Sea Lion, Sea Cow, or whatever your name is… oh yeah: Seal! eat your heart out…
The show opened with Christopher’s collection. He had based his collection on what he calls: Deconstruction and Reconstruction with prints made from X-rays. He showed us lots of slitted leather skirts, shiny leather tops, sheer fabric tops and panels, and even some layered pieces in a pallet of Black, Brown and Creams. (Sounds familiar from my assessment on the outset?)

He threw in a few pops of color which actually became my favorite pieces like a gorgeous Blue Coat, and Bias cut Blue top that looked like some sort of taffeta backed with another fabric. His gown as an end piece was very pretty but had some serious issues right before it went onstage and he was frantically hacking away at the underskirt to help it. Unfortunately it shifted strangely when she walked and wasn’t too flattering unless she just stood there motionless. All in all, a solid but boring show.

Michael Kors liked it all, along with the other judges, but he felt the gown was out of place. It was better suited for another collection in his opinion, and I have to say I agree.

Next up was Melissa with her collection, which she based on the Absurd and Surreal and called an exploration of Death into Life. (That sounds like a lot of talk around why she used so much black. Again sound familiar?)

Her collection was a strong set of warrior women looks with a gorgeous fix on her white painted leather jacket with high collar, and her amazing “blood red” leather dress was an instant hit with me. The only thing that felt odd in her collection was including a piece of swimwear, but somehow it kinda worked.

The big miss for her was not putting a f’ing slit in her floor length white fitted dress. The poor model looked like Mariah Carey at the end of “Glitter” hobbling across a field with her arms open. (Shut up, yes I watched that awful movie so sue me.)

The judges liked her work but called her on her white dress slit issue as predicted. I was very impressed with her collection and was happy to see her creating garments that fit a woman so amazingly well. She has an innate ability to hug all the right curves of a woman’s body, and still create these incredible necklines that don’t end up costumey at all. She is a talented girl!
Dmitry was our third installment with a collection he said is based on Organic Architecture. His collection was comprised of black, white, silver, and one creamy yellow dress. His work looked polished, and amazingly well-tailored. The silver paillette dress was simply stunning, but his styling was GOD AWFUL!

His models looked like aliens with big unibrows and silver crap on the back of their hair. It was awful styling and amazing clothes. The only dress I could really fault him on was his fringed sequined gown that looked like it had fringe made of sequined monkey hair.

Tough call overall, but the judges ate it up as I imagined they would.

Last, but not least, was Fabio with his Cosmic Tribalism collection. He said he based the looks on research of tribal celebrations, but, in the end, while there was some improvement here and there I was not wild about this collection.

He had some interesting cuts and I liked his new shorts he created to solve the ugly pant issues, but they all still looked like baggy draped nothing clothes. His models ended up resembling skinny girls wearing white tents from Lane Bryant that were thrown in the dryer with some child’s crayon collection. Soft pastel stains on muslin bags were what I saw walk down that runway and over-all I was not impressed.

Me and my friend were watching and kept looking to see if we could find a similarly stained dryer sheet still stuck to one of these garments. But as predicted again, the judges loved it.

After the designers left the stage, the deliberations began, and the judges really showed how they felt about the clothes after blowing so much smoke up the asses of our contestants.

In the end, Christopher was sent packing first with a fourth place finish. I agreed fully with their assessment here. His response: “Whatever.” Yup that about sums it up for you buddy, whatever.

Next to be auf’d and sent on her way was Melissa, which really bummed me out. I thought she nailed it, but I’m sure they couldn’t fall in love with a SPRING collection that looked like a Goth Fall dream. I guess I understand. We will definitely see more of her out there in the design world.

With our top two at hand it was obvious who I thought should go, and in the end it was what they decided…. Fabio was sent packing with a second place finish. I really like Fabio’s work when he isn’t making baggy white messes, but this collection was a miss, my friend.

Dmitry is our winner for this season. And styling aside he really did create some incredibly cut and crafted pieces.

But the whole end of the episode was one big anticlimactic blah. Instead of a YES!!! WOOHOO!! it ended with more of a golf clap. *golf claps all around…Next week PROJECT RUNWAY: All-Stars starts up for a second season. I won’t be writing weekly about it, because how many ways can I bitch about Isaac Mizrahi? I will however check in from time to time through my other blogumn on here: A Tall Glass of Shame, so stay tuned to my posts every other Thursday.

It has been a pleasure to take this journey once again with you, dear readers. I know the season was sort of a let down in many ways, but it is always fun dishing out the snark each week regardless of what drama airs on the runway. See you next season for even more hideous designs, and possible brilliance!