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Sapphic Spring Is In the Air: Ask Dr. Miro [What You Didn’t Learn In Health Class]

Dear Dr. Miro,

I have decided that this Spring I shall have my lesbian experience. It just seems like something I should do. Suggestions?


Cara Pitt Munche

Dear CPM,

Your question is more of a Michael Scott Declaration. Simply replace Bankruptcy with LESBIAN Experience.  Let’s consider why you think this is something you should do. Really, if you are attracted to ladies, just woman up about it. If you are doing this to turn on a boyfriend, understand how offensive it is to folks who actually have desire towards members of their same gender. Do you think sex with women will make your eyes pop, like wearing more purple? It is a possibility. Is this like a New Year’s resolution to take better care of your feet? In that case, perhaps you should embark on a quest for better hygiene, health and pleasure! Whatever your brain may be spinning around about, please enjoy yourself and be safe. Romancing a Sapphic Sweetie may be exciting, uncharted territory you are drawn towards, like bungee jumping or Full Moon Kayaking with crocodiles and, like these adventures, there are precautions.

All I ask of you in your Girls Gone Wild biblical exploit(s) is to keep the following advice in mind: Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself while asking what your Special Lady Friend actually wishes to have done. It is not always what you may think or what you want.  So yes. As always, keep the communication way open. Let your Lovely Lass know the situation up front, so nobody gets hurt against her volition. Hopefully, this is not merely an item to be checked off a list like buying toothpaste or changing health insurance. Allow your exploration through the Isle of Lesbos to be an enjoyable journey in which you actually learn a little bit about yourself and others.

Lust & Happiness,

Dr. Miro

featured image credit: quirkybird