Learning by Mistaking [Frankie Says…] Apr05

Learning by Mistaking [Frankie Says…]

Frankie Says… Triple check everything before you send it to the editor. By day I’m a writer. By night… I’m a producer. Actually that’s not entirely true. Yes, I’m a writer and yes, I’m a producer, but that first sentence just sounded cool so I wanted to write it that way. Day and night, I’m pretty much doing both all the time. I didn’t go to school for either profession, but serendipitously I have found myself quite happy in my career choices, although it took a while to get here. But having not gone to school there are situations I have come across, and continue to come across still, where I am just completely ill-equipped to be handling these said situations. Take for instance, my recent article publishing on a high profile website. The editor said she loved the story – great news. It was on the front page of the site – great news. Twenty minutes after the story goes up I get an email from a producer on the film I was writing about saying I spelled the title wrong – shit news. I scramble and email my editor, apologizing profusely. She changes it accordingly, but says that she is ‘dismayed’ at how a journalist could get something like that incorrect. Dismayed. Ouch. That had the same sting as when, at age 12, you are told by a parent that they aren’t mad at you, just disappointed. It’s a searing sentence that sits in your stomach. You know you’re not just bad, but stupid too. In my opinion stupid is worse than being bad. At least bad has a motivation behind it, usually. Stupid is just, well, stupid. No forethought goes into stupid. So here I was, with my pants down, begging...

Friends With Bummers! [Ask Dr. Miro: What You Didn’t Learn In Health Class]...

Dear Dr. Miro, I started seeing a guy from work in Friends With Benefits way but we only hook up when he’s REALLY drunk. I was really happy with the situation – no strings attached, etc and thought he was too but then he’s sober he goes on about how “It was such a mistake” and we shouldn’t do that again. AND, when my ex showed up at a bar we were all at together my FWB’s gave us the evil stink eye all. night. long. What gives? Sincerely, Toni Dear T, First of all, Work Guy is obviously not happy with your Friends With Benefits situation. He has deeper feelings for you compounded with layers he is not admitting even to himself. If you truly want a FWBs experience, consider someone who can actually use his or her words to articulate what they are thinking and feeling in a manner that will facilitate a fun night and not leave any residual guilt (on his end) or doubts (that I hear from you). I am not coming down on your happiness with your current set-up but, how good could the sex be if he is always “really drunk” by the time you get it on? Having a sloppy night of passion can be great for some people but I imagine being told it was a mistake can dampen the feelings. Still confused by the evil stink eye your FWBs gave you? Understand, Work Guy is not actually a Friend WITH Benefits. He is someone you work with (this in itself is going to go badly and be rather awkward) that has feelings for you, who cannot commit to an actual relationship. I am not making any value judgements in regards to committing or not...

The Gingerbread Man Cometh [Single White Nerd]

My smart phone officially and irrevocably became too smart for its own good on Thursday night at 2:30 AM.  I woke to a light beep and blinking indicator.  I picked up my phone where it sat, functioning as an alarm clock, on my bedside crate.  Instead of the clock I expected to see glowing on the LCD capacitive touch screen, a picture of a smiling green gingerbread man stared back at me. Gingerbread, Android’s new operating system, had arrived.  And he was ready to move in.  Very exciting for the faintly closeted tech fetishist. A few quick button presses, a brief wait, and my phone had become a Gingerbread house.  Casting the remnants of sleep aside, I plunged into my upgraded phone with abandon.  The keyboard had gained the ability to adapt to the maladroit proddings of my chubby fingers, the new app store lived up to expectations, the maps loaded faster, power management was much improved, the refreshed icons with their eerie green glow gave me a sense of comfort, reassuring me that technology was marching forward, filling old shells with new power and capacity.  Gingerbread had seamlessly integrated, my existing configurations and applications were unaffected apart from running more efficiently. “Gingerbread,” I said, lightly caressing the burnished silver phone, “You are amazing.” Just as I spoke, my phone buzzed.  Not in response to my words, of course.  Just a coincidence.  Surely. I cradled my Gingerbread and drifted off to sleep for another hour. When I woke up, I discovered that Gingerbread had made a small, almost unnoticeable change to one of my widgets.  I have several traffic widgets installed on my homescreen.  They’re kind of awesome.  I press the button and the widget tells me how long it will take me to...