When Pen Palling Goes Wrong [The Life and Times of Evil E]
A Proof of Nerd ID by Else “Evil E” Duff
“In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” — Martin Luther King
I don’t know exactly how true those words will be “in the end” but it is one of my favorite quotes. Sadly one thing I seem unable to forget is the day my junior high pen pal dumped me. At the time I was horrified and yet now all these years later – I am sharing it with all who want to see. Yes, here it is – for your amusement the rejection letter, dated exactly 1 month after I turned 13 years old, from Miss Jennifer Pratt, my junior high pen pal….
I never met Jennifer Pratt in person, I don’t think we ever even talked on the phone, but for a period of time fate lead us to become pen pals as part of a project during a junior high English class. I guess you are wondering what I did to inspire my pen pal to dump me so cruelly.
I’m sure kids today have it a bit easier, if their pen pals (or is it e-pals) decide to tell them off they need to look no farther than their “sent box” to see what words they wrote to evoke such a response. I’m only going on my memory and I seem to recall it had something to do with this: It was at this time girls my age were starting their menstrual cycle.
Talk about a difficult and embarrassing time for a girl, getting your first period was not easy. But one of my friends embraced this time of change, she didn’t hide it, she wasn’t embarrassed, she sent out postcards to her closest friends ANNOUNCING it. I was in awe of this obvious display of female empowerment, completely in awe. And I think I attempted to do something similar – but for me it went terribly wrong. I didn’t inspire Jennifer Pratt with the same level of feminine unity and strength – instead I inspired her to dump me as her pen pal. Who knows maybe it was something else I said to piss her off, we were barely 13 years old so that was certainly possible.
I guess I will never be able to exactly remember what happened. But when I recently found the letter while cleaning out my childhood home it did bring back some emotions however they weren’t the ones I had when I first got the letter. I remember being absolutely mortified reading the letter when I got it, but finding it 25 years later well lets just say it inspired tears of laughter. In a way while dealing with the horribly depressing situation of cleaning out my mom’s house after putting her into a nursing home – finding the letter was the one thing that made me laugh the most and I guess in a way I owe my old pen pal a thank you for that.
I have no idea whatever happened to Jennifer Pratt, hell maybe she has a MySpace page. Being that she was from Flint, Michigan, I must say I can’t watch the Michael Moore movie “Roger and Me” without thinking of her. As for the girl who was the aspiring feminist, yup we’re still friends.
Thanks WAF. Now everyone's wondering why I'm laughing so hard at my desk. I am so curious about this Jennifer Pratt person now. I wish we had the resources to do a "Where Are They Now?" on this one.
this is awesome
Evil E,
I haven't been commenting for you because I don't like you. Why should I leave a comment for a person I don't like. I am a good commenter. But I'm not going to leave a comment for you. There are lots of others for whom I leave comments. I'm not going to waste my cool emoticons on you. So here is a plain black arial font and my last comment for you. I'm glad you're not going to reply to my comment.
Sincerely,
WonderfullyAwflRobin
p.s. Seriously – don't reply to my comment.
p.p.s. I have been on vacation and just read your blog today.
Maybe you should hunt for her on Facebook and post a JPEG of her last letter to you on her Wall for the world to see… ;)
As some wise man once pointed out, "Revenge is a dish served best when cold."
OMG, I just laughed tea out my nose. Thank you for sharing that!
So funny, thank you for sharing this! :-)
Wasn't Jennifer Pratt the woman selling rabbits for "pets or meat?" in Roger and Me?
this is hilarious. you must find jp… just don't waste any stationary on her.
Else, this is painfully hilarious and WAF you are too damn funny! I read this out loud to my husband and son (8 months old and has no idea what I am saying) and we are all cracking up!
love this. love love love. please find jennifer pratt, and please ask michael moore to make a documentary about your reunion.
Hey WAF – Just because I never wrote Jennifer back doesn't mean I'm not going to reply to your comment. I'm SO sending you a card announcing when I start menopause!!
i would so watch a documentary about this.
Oh man that was amazing. I also feel it was painfully funny. and props to WAF. Now I'm looking forward to also checking out your other blogs.
Thanks WAF. Now everyone's wondering why I'm laughing so hard at my desk. I am so curious about this Jennifer Pratt person now. I wish we had the resources to do a "Where Are They Now?" on this one.
this is awesome
Evil E,
I haven't been commenting for you because I don't like you. Why should I leave a comment for a person I don't like. I am a good commenter. But I'm not going to leave a comment for you. There are lots of others for whom I leave comments. I'm not going to waste my cool emoticons on you. So here is a plain black arial font and my last comment for you. I'm glad you're not going to reply to my comment.
Sincerely,
WonderfullyAwflRobin
p.s. Seriously – don't reply to my comment.
p.p.s. I have been on vacation and just read your blog today.
Maybe you should hunt for her on Facebook and post a JPEG of her last letter to you on her Wall for the world to see… ;)
As some wise man once pointed out, "Revenge is a dish served best when cold."
OMG, I just laughed tea out my nose. Thank you for sharing that!
So funny, thank you for sharing this! :-)
Wasn't Jennifer Pratt the woman selling rabbits for "pets or meat?" in Roger and Me?
this is hilarious. you must find jp… just don't waste any stationary on her.
Else, this is painfully hilarious and WAF you are too damn funny! I read this out loud to my husband and son (8 months old and has no idea what I am saying) and we are all cracking up!
love this. love love love. please find jennifer pratt, and please ask michael moore to make a documentary about your reunion.
Hey WAF – Just because I never wrote Jennifer back doesn't mean I'm not going to reply to your comment. I'm SO sending you a card announcing when I start menopause!!
i would so watch a documentary about this.
Oh man that was amazing. I also feel it was painfully funny. and props to WAF. Now I'm looking forward to also checking out your other blogs.
I'm glad you included a link to this…I snort-laughed. Makes me want to find this Jennifer Pratt, strike up a friendship, and then dump her.
Wendy
I'm glad you included a link to this…I snort-laughed. Makes me want to find this Jennifer Pratt, strike up a friendship, and then dump her.
Wendy