Wow! It’s Wednesday! The Two New Loves of My Life [Wassup 2010!]
As I’ve told many people IRL and online already, I’m hoping that IVF will produce one more miracle baby for us by the end of 2010. But because I’m anxious, I’ve started to get a little scared that it won’t work the second time as easily as it did the first. Sometimes I think that I just shouldn’t talk about it. Maybe if I keep my hopes secret from the universe, then it won’t burn me.
But then I remember driving to my first date with my future-husband, CH, and saying, “Universe, I’m ready, I’m truly ready,” and that turned out pretty well. So I look at pictures like this 4-seater orange Vespa, and I imagine myself and CH on it sometime during the 2020s with our daughter, Betty, and her future sibling, tooling around the Italiano countryside, and I think, “Yes, this could happen.”
For whatever reason, I’ve always believed that if I talk aloud about something good happening, then it will and if I imagine something bad happening, then it won’t. For example, I never, ever imagined that my mother would die early, but before my date with CH, who I was really excited about, I said, “Universe, I’m ready, I’m truly ready.”
The other day I read something which opined that a novelist shouldn’t tell anyone about her work in progress, just like a mother shouldn’t tell anyone about the life growing inside of her until it’s at least three months old.
I actually believe the opposite. When Betty was confirmed, I told EVERYBODY. I called up friends, I wrote about it on Fierce and Nerdy. If a random friend asked me how I was doing two weeks after I found out Betty was a go, I would say, “Well, I’m pregnant!” I committed to to the new life inside of me.
And I commit to my novels. It’s the least I can do. I’ve never stuck with a guy that refused to label me his girlfriend and I don’t see any sense in not letting people know what I’m passionate about. “Hi, everybody, this is my new love, The Awesome Girl’s Guide to Dating Extraordinary Men, and I’m soooooo into it. I mean my nose is wide-open for this novel, even though I’m not sure if it loves me back yet, just because it is so very, very dope.”
Anywho, orange is my favorite color and I love this Vespa. I’m painting a 2020s picture in my mind of me and my family on this Vespa, and I’m committing to it. It’ll happen.
I just know it will.
Click on the pic for more info about the Vespa.
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The best advice I ever heard about divulging pregnancy, and I think it applies to pretty much everything in life, is to only share the news early with people that you would tell if something went wrong. Based on your blog to date, I'd say if you're comfortable enough to share the joy then you'd be brave enough to share the pain. Not that you will need to because clearly your body knows what it has to do and will no doubt do it again with an equally adorable result.
I am trying to be more declarative about my life this year, too. It has worked really well in my personal life, but not so well professionally. Probably something to do with follow through and my complete lack of it.
The best advice I ever heard about divulging pregnancy, and I think it applies to pretty much everything in life, is to only share the news early with people that you would tell if something went wrong. Based on your blog to date, I'd say if you're comfortable enough to share the joy then you'd be brave enough to share the pain. Not that you will need to because clearly your body knows what it has to do and will no doubt do it again with an equally adorable result.
I am trying to be more declarative about my life this year, too. It has worked really well in my personal life, but not so well professionally. Probably something to do with follow through and my complete lack of it.
The best advice I ever heard about divulging pregnancy, and I think it applies to pretty much everything in life, is to only share the news early with people that you would tell if something went wrong. Based on your blog to date, I'd say if you're comfortable enough to share the joy then you'd be brave enough to share the pain. Not that you will need to because clearly your body knows what it has to do and will no doubt do it again with an equally adorable result.
I am trying to be more declarative about my life this year, too. It has worked really well in my personal life, but not so well professionally. Probably something to do with follow through and my complete lack of it.
Oh, follow-through is my absolute worst problem. The only reason I get anything done is b/c CH is basically pushes me and pushes me in the nicest way possible. I think this is the main reason people probably hire life coaches.
Oh, follow-through is my absolute worst problem. The only reason I get anything done is b/c CH is basically pushes me and pushes me in the nicest way possible. I think this is the main reason people probably hire life coaches.
Oh, follow-through is my absolute worst problem. The only reason I get anything done is b/c CH is basically pushes me and pushes me in the nicest way possible. I think this is the main reason people probably hire life coaches.
You are lucky that when Betty was a go she kept on going. I used to be a firm believer in announcing to the world I was pregnant. The problem was after announcing "I'm pregnant, Im pregnant", when it turned into a no go, I had to annouce "I'm not pregnant" and that's a bummer for everybody. Then you run into somebody a year later that says "Oh, didn't you have a kid?" and you have to relive the disappointment in an awkward and uncomfortable situation. After two of those I kept the third to myself and now if there is a fourth I will be guarded. But, again, you are lucky to have a public forum where we can all share with you through the whole process. Not to mention, you are also young and ready. And, as much as it seems problematic to rely on IVF, you're lucky there too. It has a much better success rate than the natural way!
Elise, I thought about that often before announcing that I was pregnant via IVF. And if anything had gone wrong, I would have announced "I'm not pregnant" here, too. In many ways that's easier, b/c most often you don't have to tell people in person, b/c either they read it on your blog or they hear about it from someone who read it on your blog. So in many ways I find it easier to be fully forthcoming here.
I guess the point that I was trying to make with this article is that I hate being scared, and when I get scared, I find it helpful to just fully commit to what I'm scared about in a public way b/c I believe that there's some kind of magic associated with that. For me.
Others have their own brand of magic. And I fully understand why people choose to keep certain things to themselves.
Elise, I thought about that often before announcing that I was pregnant via IVF. And if anything had gone wrong, I would have announced "I'm not pregnant" here, too. In many ways that's easier, b/c most often you don't have to tell people in person, b/c either they read it on your blog or they hear about it from someone who read it on your blog. So in many ways I find it easier to be fully forthcoming here.
I guess the point that I was trying to make with this article is that I hate being scared, and when I get scared, I find it helpful to just fully commit to what I'm scared about in a public way b/c I believe that there's some kind of magic associated with that. For me.
Others have their own brand of magic. And I fully understand why people choose to keep certain things to themselves.
You are lucky that when Betty was a go she kept on going. I used to be a firm believer in announcing to the world I was pregnant. The problem was after announcing "I'm pregnant, Im pregnant", when it turned into a no go, I had to annouce "I'm not pregnant" and that's a bummer for everybody. Then you run into somebody a year later that says "Oh, didn't you have a kid?" and you have to relive the disappointment in an awkward and uncomfortable situation. After two of those I kept the third to myself and now if there is a fourth I will be guarded. But, again, you are lucky to have a public forum where we can all share with you through the whole process. Not to mention, you are also young and ready. And, as much as it seems problematic to rely on IVF, you're lucky there too. It has a much better success rate than the natural way!
You are lucky that when Betty was a go she kept on going. I used to be a firm believer in announcing to the world I was pregnant. The problem was after announcing "I'm pregnant, Im pregnant", when it turned into a no go, I had to annouce "I'm not pregnant" and that's a bummer for everybody. Then you run into somebody a year later that says "Oh, didn't you have a kid?" and you have to relive the disappointment in an awkward and uncomfortable situation. After two of those I kept the third to myself and now if there is a fourth I will be guarded. But, again, you are lucky to have a public forum where we can all share with you through the whole process. Not to mention, you are also young and ready. And, as much as it seems problematic to rely on IVF, you're lucky there too. It has a much better success rate than the natural way!
Elise, I thought about that often before announcing that I was pregnant via IVF. And if anything had gone wrong, I would have announced "I'm not pregnant" here, too. In many ways that's easier, b/c most often you don't have to tell people in person, b/c either they read it on your blog or they hear about it from someone who read it on your blog. So in many ways I find it easier to be fully forthcoming here.
I guess the point that I was trying to make with this article is that I hate being scared, and when I get scared, I find it helpful to just fully commit to what I'm scared about in a public way b/c I believe that there's some kind of magic associated with that. For me.
Others have their own brand of magic. And I fully understand why people choose to keep certain things to themselves.