Cut The IRS A Break, Says No One [DAILY NEWS BRIEF]

Washington, DC – Tuesday
By Joshua Mauldin

Amidst increasing pressure from Republican leaders for over-scrutinizing conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status, no one stood up to defend the Internal Revenue Service in any way, shape or form.

“Sure it looks like they engaged in partisan shenanigans but I think we owe them the benefit of the doubt,” said not a single person.

“The Internal Revenue Service is a cornerstone of our democracy, let’s show some respect,” remarked bupkus echoing through an empty chamber.

The deafening plea for sympathy from exactly zero Americans is appreciated by IRS executive Mandy Fatch.

“We can be a little inflexible at times and I certainly understand why the citizens of this country might hold that against us,” said Fatch through an encouraged grin. “But the fact that absolutely none of them can look past that and come to our defense is, dare I say, inspiring.”