Oh, It’s Tuesday: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
MMKV proving that there is coolness after motherhood
So my best friend, MMKV from “Political Physics” cut her hair into a pretty fierce “lockhawk” last Friday. And, of course, this wasn’t a decision that came easily. We talked about it for hours, and from what I can tell she receive tons of counsel from her other friends as well.
You see, when you’re young, changing your hairstyle is a must. I cut off all of my hair at the age of 17, and then changed it up in some sort of way every six months until the age of 21 when I got dreadlocks. And even after that I dyed it and styled it and curled it, so that it felt like a new hairstyle all the time.
Then I hit my 30s. Suddenly I was okay with wearing my dreads strictly straight or in curls. No new styles, no more funky dye jobs. For almost two years straight I wore my hair like that.
Then one day, I washed my hair and couldn’t retwist the new growth. Seriously that’s how it felt. Like I simply couldn’t possibly bear ever putting my hair into the same style again. At first I thought I was just being lazy, but then one week passed. Then two. And when I was facing down a third week straight of wearing hats and bandanas to cover the little afro of new growth that I was letting grow wild, I started looking into dread comb outs.
As it turned out, my 12yo, waistlength dreads were way too long and old for a comb out. Also, I couldn’t find anyone in LA who specialized in them, so even if I cut them down to pick out size, I wouldn’t have any help.
Still, I was loathe to let go of all my hair, so I tried the arduous process of picking them out myself, only to get about a fourth of one dread done after two hours of work.
That’s when I realized that I was either going to have to stick with the same hairstyle or I was going to have to cut all of my hair off. There was no in-between.
Feeling so afraid of making the decision was actually what sealed the deal for me. When had I become so connected to my hair? I wondered. Did I really believe that my attractiveness or unattractiveness resided solely in my hair? How had it come to hold so much power over me?
So I cut it all off. And less than a month after that I quit my job, started my IVF cycle, and got serious about sending out my book. I’m not saying I wouldn’t have done any of that without the big haircut, but I do believe that we carry a lot of memories and emotion in our hair, and that cutting off 12 years worth of hair set me free to make some big moves.
However, I’m once again bored with my hairstyle and thinking about making a big change again. Also, I’m dead curious to see what MMKV will do now that she’s rocking a hawk.
But how about you? Have you ever made a drastic change to your hair? And if so, what inspired it? Were you happy with the results? Sound off in the comments.
oooooh she's one hot MILF!
oooooh she's one hot MILF!
It's funny cause those same questions (e.g., when had I become so connected to my hair, did I really believe that my attractiveness or unattractiveness resided solely in my hair, how had it come to hold so much power over me, etc.) have been running through my thoughts and filling up my conversations with you and other friends over the last month or so. And the disappointing thing was I had to admit that the length of my hair had taken over and definitely felt interconnected with my perception of how attractive I was. There was definitely a fear of "what if" about cutting my locs off and that was even before I thought about how extreme the lockhawk would be. It seems crazy, but someone who wore "extra short" natural for nearly eight years was afraid of a little trim! What! When did I let my fear of someone else's perception of "beauty" overcome me? When did I let someone else's perception of what is or is not "professional" overpower me? When did I become the world's bitch? When I finally decided to actually do it (which was not until I was actually sitting in the hairdresser's chair after just deciding it was crazy), it was an amazing moment! I was so excited and afterwards so happy. It was like a sigh of relief. Not because the hair was gone, but because I was "okay" with the hair being gone. In fact, I was happy with the complete sense of freedom and I am very much looking forward to tomorrow and what else I can do that seems a bit crazy for a 32 year old!
It's funny cause those same questions (e.g., when had I become so connected to my hair, did I really believe that my attractiveness or unattractiveness resided solely in my hair, how had it come to hold so much power over me, etc.) have been running through my thoughts and filling up my conversations with you and other friends over the last month or so. And the disappointing thing was I had to admit that the length of my hair had taken over and definitely felt interconnected with my perception of how attractive I was. There was definitely a fear of "what if" about cutting my locs off and that was even before I thought about how extreme the lockhawk would be. It seems crazy, but someone who wore "extra short" natural for nearly eight years was afraid of a little trim! What! When did I let my fear of someone else's perception of "beauty" overcome me? When did I let someone else's perception of what is or is not "professional" overpower me? When did I become the world's bitch? When I finally decided to actually do it (which was not until I was actually sitting in the hairdresser's chair after just deciding it was crazy), it was an amazing moment! I was so excited and afterwards so happy. It was like a sigh of relief. Not because the hair was gone, but because I was "okay" with the hair being gone. In fact, I was happy with the complete sense of freedom and I am very much looking forward to tomorrow and what else I can do that seems a bit crazy for a 32 year old!
why do two of the most beautiful, smart, amazing women that I know, (one who I gave birth too!) worry so much about their hair when they both are hot stuff! go figure!
why do two of the most beautiful, smart, amazing women that I know, (one who I gave birth too!) worry so much about their hair when they both are hot stuff! go figure!
My hair is always, always, always the same. Universally thought to be my best feature (unless you're a breast man!). I will change it when it no longer works for me, but until then I will continue to look as I have for decades.
My hair is always, always, always the same. Universally thought to be my best feature (unless you're a breast man!). I will change it when it no longer works for me, but until then I will continue to look as I have for decades.