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Political Pundit Gives Snarky Partisan Defense/Attack; America A Better Place [Daily News Brief]

Washington D.C – Wednesday
By Joshua Mauldin

A political pundit patted himself/herself on the back yesterday after writing a vitriolic, straw man defense/attack of his/her preferred side of the Democrat/Republican false dichotomy.

“There are real issues out there,” proclaimed the pundit while trying on a new suit/dress. “But those issues are often complicated without a clear black-and-white answer. By reinforcing the liberal versus conservative canard, I’m giving people a valuable shorthand on how to feel about them. Americans need me.”

Though admitting the defense/attack was an irrelevant, nonsensical piece of ad hominem chicanery, the pundit said American principles should always trump thoughtful discourse or respectable debate.

“Did you see how many hits my blog got? Or the cable news ratings when I appeared? I’ve successfully monetized my voice by satiating a demand, that’s basic economics. What’s more American than that?”

Feature Image Credit: Michael O. Leavitt CFP