Frankie says… Sometimes you just have to put your foot down. For me it happened this week, when I realized that the man I was falling for was utterly, ultimately f-ed up. He was going to drag me down with him, or worse, use me like he uses the other girls. I’ve come to the conclusion that I have what the masses call ‘daddy issues.’ Actually, that’s a lie. I have always used that term loosely when describing my issues with men, but only recently has it actually had any weight. I always used it in this ethereal, unattached way – like even if I said it, it wasn’t actually me with the issue. I never truly believed it, just assumed it was part of my cultural make-up. Now, it’s showing its authenticity in the men I choose. They are usually in the same line of work my father is in, emotionally they are haywire, and they always don’t necessarily like me to begin with. It’s the winning them over that gives me the first thrill. It’s the power of turning them, making them see me and want to be with me. This resonates with the little girl in me who knew she had a father out there, but he didn’t want me – left before I was born and didn’t seem to care all that much that I existed until many, many years later, when I made him see me, made him want me. That initial gaining of control is what hooks me, and them. After that it turns into a game of ‘I like you. Do you like me?’ The constant search of approval, in whatever form it comes – sex is most often the medium. So I use that to keep...

The heart is a tough muscle.  Despite the movies that depict a warrior taking a bite of a still beating specimen torn from the chest of an enemy, most cookery books suggest a long marinating in vinegar and red wine followed by hours of slow baking or stewing to render the chewy, lean muscle edible. The irony of how fragile is the heart of a lover can never be far from the chef’s mind. The slightest decrease of attention, the lengthening silences, the decision often made to sleep rather than indulge in other bed time activities, all these are signs of passion that has naturally deepened and become milder with time and trust. Unfortunately, they are also signs of impending doom, and it is often difficult to tell exactly where you are when you are right in the middle of it. So on this Valentine’s Day, and every day, my advice is this: no matter how exhausted you are, how wrapped up in your own cares and troubles, take the time every day to hold your lover’s face, stare deep into his or her eyes, and say the words that make even the toughest hearts melt. Homemade Nut and Berry Bars Courtesy of L Fusco and Sherry Mosovsky These bars are a great source of nourishment and will give you tons of energy to love your mate! Necessary equipment: Food Processor 1 lb dates, preferably fresh -must pit before processing .5lb mix of salted nuts – peanut, walnuts, almonds, or whatever nut you love 2 tbsp unsweetened peanut butter Dried fruit such as apricots or fruit leather pieces Process nuts until they are powder. Process dates .25lb at a time until you have four balls of date goop. Add powdered nuts to dates and process....