Dear Dr. Miro, I just had a baby and do not associate my lady bits with getting sexy anymore. My nipples are now the domain of my little one and I do NOT want them incorporated into Mommy-Daddy Time. Even my vagina seems more like a place for my sweet child to exit rather than a pleasure center. I used to be horny ALL the time and now I avoid my hubby when he starts to get that look. How do I get my sexy back? Sincerely, Lost My Groove Dear LMG, This is a common problem that comes up for many moms. Of course you are going to be focused on how to keep your little bundle of joy alive and the sexy stuff can easily slip to the way side. This is understandable. It is fantastic you acknowledge your need to re-engage in your marriage, and your SELF, sexually. This process of re-eroticizing can be difficult but in the end, rewarding. Self-pleasure is always the place to begin. Get out that dusty vibrator and remember how much fun you had pre-baby. Take, for want of a better term, baby steps. You know how sometimes you have to fake a smile to pave the way for a more pleasant experience? This can be applied to sexuality, too. If you can kick start your libido with some fun alone time – you and your vibrator, that is, you may find it will ignite a bit of that forgotten Sexy you so desire. To be blatant: get some blood back into your clitoris with what ever means necessary until you bring yourself to orgasm. Only after that will you be able to engage with your baby’s daddy in a relaxed and sexual way. PLEASE do...

Recently I was lucky enough to travel to Toronto to see a few days of filming of the episode my husband wrote for Warehouse 13. Being on set everyday I was there, I did not get to spend much time being a tourist. I’ve been to Toronto countless times, and love the city, but thought I had pretty much seen it all. Then one day I decided to go for a walk near the location to get some tea, and stumbled upon a fun and lovely neighborhood: Leslieville. Leslieville is quaint and special in the best of ways. While the neighborhood itself spans a few miles, the heart of it is on Queen Street. Boutiques, markets and any odd store line this street with downtown Toronto in the near distance. There is pretty much a shop for everything: a pie shop, a cheese shop, a fish shop, a baby shop, etc. Within a few blocks radius, you can find pretty much every necessity and indulgence.  And from what I could tell, the shops all tend to focus on locally made or grown items. It was a Thursday evening when I happened to find this jewel of a town. It had the perfect amount of “buzz” too it. Not too many crowds, not too little, but just right. Many of the shops were open past 7pm, which in small towns I’ve found is quite rare. The local eateries, which all smelled fantastic, were filled with pretty much every walk of life. Within a few blocks you could find just about any food you would desire from around the world. Brazilian, Cuban, Thai, Vietnamese, and so on. There was even the quintessential Irish Pub. I could have easily spent the whole day there going in and...

Recently, in the comments for my post on the perils and ennui of FMLA, Ernessa requested that I address Paternity Leave, since my post was more focused on Maternity Leave. So, for Ernessa and all you men out there who are about to be fathers, maybe could someday be fathers, don’t want to be fathers but might be kind of curious why they had to cover for Joey last year when his wife had twins, or wives/baby mamas who need ammunition in their arguments with their husbands/baby daddies as to why they need to take time off to care for the new baby—this one is for you. True story, here is a reenactment of a conversation I had once with an executive regarding paternity leave: Me: Hi Dave, I just heard from Mike that he is going to be taking Paternity Leave for a month in August. Dave: (laughing) Paternity Leave? Me: Yes, his wife is due August 1, so he’s thinking it will start around then. Dave: (laughing harder) Paternity Leave? Me: Yes, so we have a couple of months to plan ahead. Do you need any resources from HR to help plan for his absence? A temp employee perhaps? Dave: (still laughing) Come on… Me: So, you should think about coordinating schedules, especially if others in that department are planning on taking vacation in August… Dave: (laughing a little less) Seriously? Paternity Leave? Me: Yes Dave: Is that even a thing? Me: Yes Dave: (not laughing anymore) For a month?!? Me: Well he’s eligible for 12 weeks, he’s only taking a month Dave: And we have to let him do this? Yes Dave, sorry to say, but in 2012 Paternity Leave is no joke. And that’s great, right? Yay men! Now not...

Since I believe this is still such an important topic and the ONE thing I would tell people about to reproduce, it’s my favorite piece from the last year. Also because it has ‘prairie dogging’ it’ somewhere in there. How can you not like a story with THAT phrase in it? Frankie Says…. Take care of someone else’s children before you have your own. As a single female, frequent babysitter and auntie since the day I was born (complicated family make-up), I have the distinct authority to recommend that everyone, and I mean everyone should go through an overnight care-taking situation with friends or family prior to popping out their own. This past weekend my sister and her husband took off to Miami for a wedding. They have never left their two children – Jay, age 4 and Lily, age 2 – alone before this getaway, so naturally my sister was freaking out. She still hadn’t weaned Lily and James still won’t sleep alone. I was pretty clear on what I was in for, but thank god I had my niece (from a different sister), Sydney, there to help out. Wednesday night until Sunday morning I played mommy with Sydney, driving around in my Mom-Mobile, with my Mom music playing and my Mom outfits on. Now for me – someone who’s been a live-in nanny, traveled abroad as a nanny, babysits at least a couple times a week – this wasn’t a super stressful weekend. However, if I had put ten of my single, 20-something friends up to the task of Lily and Jay, I think 7 of them would end the weekend with a vasectomy/hysterectomy. On Thursday, Day Number 1, both the kiddies were throwing tantrums because their parents were nowhere to be...

Did I really write a piece about wanting, needing, liking a morning commute? Six steps.  That’s how long it takes to walk from my side of the bed to the baby monitor.  No alarm clocks, roosters, or cell phone ringers – just the sounds of a baby boy waking up to a brand new day.  It takes less than 3 seconds to clock in.  I turn off the monitor, hit the bathroom, and free my son from the confines of his crib.  I change his diaper, put him in a new outfit, feed him breakfast (which sometimes entails another outfit change), and get him his milk.  By the time this is done I’ve already logged over an hour on the job.  No shit. I’ve had horrible commutes in my life, especially in Los Angeles.  Try to get from Los Feliz to Westwood in less than an hour during peak traffic times if you don’t believe me. I’ve seen road rage, car accidents, motorcycle crashes, bikers hit, crazy people standing in the middle of the road, lanes closed, roads closed, flat tires, rain, hail, fog, photo shoots, tv shoots, film shoots, celebrity sightings, paparazzi, tourists, old drivers, young drivers, new drivers.  You name it, I’ve seen it on the streets of LA and so have you. The difference is that I miss it.  Unlike other jobs being a stay-at-home parent is a seemingly never-ending endeavor.  I’m my own boss, I guess, but I don’t set my own hours.  I get breaks.  I don’t take breaks.  And even if I’m not “working”, I’m always on call. What I miss most about commuting is that it was my time.  I’m driving my car to my job with my thoughts running through my head.  My most productive writing...