I would like to use this week’s post to give you some advice. If you haven’t already committed and shacked up, don’t marry a guy with kids. Don’t get me wrong; the kids aren’t the problem. Once you get over the initial horror of taking a rectal temperature or helping a little boy wipe himself, the trials of co-parenting become manageable, and after time the benefits outweigh the work. But if you’re going to wait until your mid-thirties to tie the knot, and you end up with a divorcé, I do suggest that you try to pre-screen the ex-wife. Ha! Like that’s even possible. It’s frustrating. I’ve been a part of this family for almost three years and I’ve hardly ever spoken to the ex directly. We exchange information through the kids. On the speakerphone, she asks them something, they ask me, I respond and they tell their mom. She never acknowledges I’m there. I think she tries to pretend I don’t play a role in their lives, that I’m no more than one of their forgettable afternoon babysitters, but I’d like to think I play a bigger role and I wish there could be more cooperation between us. Why are we buying two sets of sneakers for kids who are going to outgrow them in four months? When we signed them up for activities last fall, we had to go in on the assumption that they’d only be able to go every other week, and even now I’m the one who brings my step-daughter to her dance class every Friday, even when she’s sleeping at her Mom’s house. I’ve never asked the ex to communicate with me, I’ve given the woman space, hoping that through a kind tone and cooperative attitude, she would...