A few weeks ago I read a story about a guy who flipped out when someone asked him the most common of all lazy cocktail party questions:  “What do you do?”  Instead of answering, the guy threw a hissy fit and lashed out at the questioner, calling them all sorts of names, before storming out of the room.  It all seemed a bit immature. No, the guy wasn’t me.  It really was a story I read somewhere. Anyway, as I prepare to leave my job, I kind of see where the guy was coming from.  “What do you do” is a really annoying question.  Here’s why: Generally, if someone is asking what you do, it’s not out of any genuine interest in what you do.  They just met you, what do they care.  It’s so they can categorize you.  In Los Angeles, an answer of “I’m an actor” comes with a whole host of background characteristics:  self-centered, bartender, superficial, etc..  A answer of “I work for a nonprofit that serves homeless youth” comes with another set:  self-sacrificing, poor, noble, etc.  Based on your answer, the questioner then assumes a certain social stance towards you. This happens.  I’ve had occasion to give both of those answers at times–actor and nonprofiteer–and have seen wildly different reactions.  The assumption behind the question, of course, is that what we do as a job defines who we are as people.  I’ve tried combatting this assumption by elaborating.  “Oh, I’m an actor, but I also write and work with nonprofits” or “Oh, I work with homeless youth, but I’m really an actor.”  It doesn’t matter; all of that is too complicated for a cocktail party.  You can only be one thing. Rather than getting frustrated about it, I propose a...