The heart is a tough muscle.  Despite the movies that depict a warrior taking a bite of a still beating specimen torn from the chest of an enemy, most cookery books suggest a long marinating in vinegar and red wine followed by hours of slow baking or stewing to render the chewy, lean muscle edible. The irony of how fragile is the heart of a lover can never be far from the chef’s mind. The slightest decrease of attention, the lengthening silences, the decision often made to sleep rather than indulge in other bed time activities, all these are signs of passion that has naturally deepened and become milder with time and trust. Unfortunately, they are also signs of impending doom, and it is often difficult to tell exactly where you are when you are right in the middle of it. So on this Valentine’s Day, and every day, my advice is this: no matter how exhausted you are, how wrapped up in your own cares and troubles, take the time every day to hold your lover’s face, stare deep into his or her eyes, and say the words that make even the toughest hearts melt. Homemade Nut and Berry Bars Courtesy of L Fusco and Sherry Mosovsky These bars are a great source of nourishment and will give you tons of energy to love your mate! Necessary equipment: Food Processor 1 lb dates, preferably fresh -must pit before processing .5lb mix of salted nuts – peanut, walnuts, almonds, or whatever nut you love 2 tbsp unsweetened peanut butter Dried fruit such as apricots or fruit leather pieces Process nuts until they are powder. Process dates .25lb at a time until you have four balls of date goop. Add powdered nuts to dates and process....

Dear Dr. Miro, In my fantasies, I objectify women. If I think about them too much as real life people they cease being sexy. I love my wife but as a loving caring brilliantly pure being. It’s only when I see her as a sweet piece of ass am I turned on by her. I understand that there are two different types of energies in a relationship: one for the heart & mind (the relationship), and then that other for the genitals (the sex). Both are important but how can I avoid killing that animalism of sex? I’m talking about that thing that disconnects the mind – the part that loses sight of “relationship stuff” like figuring out what couch to buy. Obviously, objectification is unhealthy. But isn’t that part of sexual attraction? Maybe it’s just a male thing or at least a masculine trait. Will this haunt me the rest of my life? I feel bad turning my wife into an object. Sincerely, Mr. Love2Love Her Dear Mr. L2LH, The quick answer is yes, there is a major element of objectification in sexual attraction and no, it is not a purely male thing. Read on if you want more details… Objectification is not unhealthy, in and of it’s self. Really, it is how you manage it. You are right in thinking that there are different levels of relating to each other, all very important, depending upon what type of interpersonal connections you desire. Objectifying another being can be extremely liberating if there is some understanding before and after of the person behind the object. This is specifically true for long-term situations. If we were discussing one-night stands or booty calls, this would not surface as an issue, in that all you have is...