It’s the clear bubbly beverage your mom would give you as a child when you had an upset stomach or fever.  7 Up is part of America, but the classic citrus soft drink which almost disappeared from stores is fighting to make a come back. 7 Up, with its lemon line flavor, was created by Charles Lepier Gregg in St. Louis.  Having great success with his Howdy Orange Drink, Gregg turned his focus to lemons and limes.  After more than 2 years and 11 different formulas, he had his drink: a caramel colored “Bib-Label Lithiated Lemon-Lime Soda.” Try selling that to a marketing agency, today! It was released two weeks before the stock market crash of 1929, and amazingly, the drink sold well. In 1935, the color was changed to clear, and the brand name to 7 Up..  Early ads promised “Seven natural flavors blended into a savory, flavory with a real whallop.” By the late 1940’s, 7 Up was the third best selling soft drink in the world! The recipe has been reformulated multiple times since the original launch.  It once contained a mood stabilizing drug, but that was removed in the 1950s.  The latest change was in 2006, when it rebranded itself as “all natural”–although after a few law suit threats the tagline was changed. Now it contains “100% natural flavors.” A common myth is that the name 7 Up represents the seven ingredients in the drink while another says that the ph is over 7. Both claims are untrue, and the real reason for the name is a mystery. The 7 Up brand has changed hands several times over the years.  In 1978 it was purchased by Philip Morris (the cigarette people), before being sold to an investment group in 1986. ...

It’s hard to believe that it’s already been a month since Obama’s re-election. With the bitterness and divisiveness of the election, the past month was a time for coming together in America. After all, Obama is happily ensconced in the White House for four more years and America’s glorious future as a gay, Muslim, socialist welfare state is at long last safe and secure. Phew! That’s right, Fox & Fuckers- all of your batshit, paranoid, Karl Rove, Donald Trump, 2016: Obama’s America, Birth of a Nation fantasies are comin’ true! Can he forcibly convert all the Mega-Churches to Mega-Mosques? YES HE CAN! Can he nationalize all the NASCAR tracks to use for Moonie style mass gay weddings? YES HE CAN! Can he change his name to Oba-MAO Bin Ladin? YES HE CAN! Can he nationalize Wal-Mart so he can use all the stores for his new line of low cost women’s health clinics- Bargain Barry’s ‘Bortions n’ Birth Control? YES HE CAN! Bring in your Kenyan birth certificate and your first service is free- who cares how expensive it is? Big government’s buying! Muahahahahahahahaha!!!! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!! Wait, what was I talking about again. Oh right, coming together. Uhm, yeah. Nice effort, guys. Good game. Way to almost steal the country using voter suppression and fraud. I’m sooooo sorry that your evil misbegotten homophobic, misogynistic, elitist, ignorant, fanatical racist effort to put the White back in the White House fell apart horribly when you found out that contrary to popular belief and 236 years of empirical evidence, you can go broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people- or at least lose an election. Who knew? (Nate Silver, bitchez! Nate Silver- statistical love machine. Nate Silver- recently voted America’s Sexiest Math Nerd by Seriously, that’s a...