An Open Letter to Women Coming of Age in the Time of Twilight About two years ago, I wrote an open letter to boys becoming men in the age of Twilight. I sought to prepare them for the trials ahead, trials made tougher by the unrealistic expectations established by Ms. Meyer and her coterie of diamond glittery vamps. Or howly hunks. Either way. Today I reach out to you. I reach out with a message not of warning, but of comfort. I reach out to let you know this (listen very, very carefully): Sex. Will. Not. Kill. You. I tell you this because if I were a tween Twi-hard and I saw the latest installment in the Twilight franchise, I might think that I should be both ashamed and terrified of sex. Even sex that has been sanctified by holy matrimony (sex before marriage would be, of course, absolutely out of the question). Here’s why: Bella and Edward share little more than steamy kisses before their wedding. At the wedding, Jacob (for the uninitiated, Jacob is a werewolf who rides a motorcycle and pouts while pining for Bella) arrives and almost beats the crap out of Edward. He doesn’t do this because he’s jealous (though he is). He does this because he is afraid that having sex with Edward will kill Bella. I know this because he bellows “YOU’LL KILL HER!” before charging off into the woods and changing into a computer generated dog. With this threat of imminent death hanging/murder over them, Edward and Bella jet off to a private island for their honeymoon. Edward, fearing the power of his vampire sex, restrains himself from consummating the marriage. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he says before condescendingly patting his barely legal bride...